I Hate My Job

August 5, 2009 | 8 Comments » | Topics: Funny Pictures, main

i hate my job

My job is so fcuking unbelievable. I’ll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career oppertunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fcuking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big fcuking dog to work. Every fcuking day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single fcuking day.

Anyway, I drive these fcuktards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shiet.

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  • Brickjames

    Hahaha great stuff

  • Mr. Tufreeh

    Sounds like you got stuck with the Scooby Doo crew, Fred.

  • Ex. Mrs Tufreeh

    Haha. Thank goodness that Mr Tufreeh cleared that up for me! Otherwise I might have thought you were referring to Speed Buggy or possibly The Funky Phantom. But no, it was Scooby Doo. Man, If it weren’t for Mr Tufreeh i’d be in the dark completely, as I was unable to decipher the baffling scenario you described. Oh Mr Tufreeh, dear dear Mr Tufreeh, I don’t know what i’d do without you. Then again, i’m sure you’ll inform me of that too.

  • Leo

    Haha…..Good stuff. I love rants!