For All The Aspiring Pickup Artist Out There, This Story Will Put A Smile On Your Aspirations

October 28, 2011 | 9 Comments » | Topics: Dating, Story

awesome pickup story


I’m in a town I’ve never been to. I had to go to FedEx and found myself standing at the stop light waiting to cross. This girl asked if I knew how to get a taxi and I said, “Oh, I’m not from here.” I was going to just keep walking, but there was something there. I don’t know, it must have been me eyeing her up and down. She’s part Lebanese and Italian. She has Olive skin and green eyes. WAY OUT OF MY LEAGUE. But instead of being a little biatch and just awkwardly walking away I introduced myself and then said, “You know what? Follow me, I’ll find us a Taxi. I need to get somewhere too.”

I flagged down a taxi and we both got in. I made some jokes about both of us being foreigners to the city and then the guy who was driving us got upset because we got stuck in traffic, I said, “Oh, don’t worry about it man. I’m totally cool with being stuck in a car with a hot girl.” She shot me a smile and I said, “Hey do you think I could convince you to go to dinner with me tonight?” She was hesitant but then I said, “What do you have to lose, really? I mean it’s not like you have anything to actually do tonight, right?” She said yes and we were on our way. I let her change in my hotel room and I got showered and she dressed UP and we went to dinner. I treated her, we talked, we moved from superficial things to talking about our families and our lives. I asked her to tell me a secret and she ended up doing so. I made fun of her for being so nervous around me. We had a really good back and forth energy. I would make fun of her and then talk about something. I asked her about herself, and then she asked about me. I joked that she was actually a con artist and that she was seducing me at dinner so her con artist friends could break into my room and steal all of my clothes. And when we went back to get her stuff, she was going to stab me in the back with a syringe and as I was falling asleep, she would kiss me and the last thing I would see is her saying goodbye.

When we finished up at dinner she grabbed my hand and we walked up to my room. Everything was PERFECTLY set up. When we got inside she stood next to my bed and I said, “Can we skip the part where you stab me in the neck with a syringe?” she smiled and kissed me. I held her wrists in case she was a crazy murderess. But it turns out she wasn’t.

All of this JUST happened so excuse my rush. It was amazing and she is a really freaking awesome person. Thank you seddit. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

Cliffnotes: Met a girl way out of my league, took her out, got past all the stupid awkward obstacles and ended up making out with her. She really really likes me.


She texted me last night when she got home. I forgot to mention that she was about to rape me, but had a 2 hour drive home and work early in the morning. She was in town because she spent the weekend with her friends and had left her car in another town over. Her message to me last night when she got home was filled with, “<3 <3 <3 <3” and “Thank you so much. You are so fcuking wonderful.” and other girly shiet like that. She wants to fly out to my state to see things. I’m freaking floored. I have no idea how this girl who is easily a 9 on my scale would want me. I’m seriously just this dorky, nerdy Asian engineer who sits around playing videogames and shiet all day long. She is half lebanese, half italian and has gigantic doe eyes that are green and a body that r/xsmall would murder me for. She’s basically some idealistic version of what I pretend I deserve. Whatever the case, I’m not going to question this shiet.