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No-Fap Is The First Step To The Rest Of Your Life With Women

June 25, 2012 | 25 Comments » | Topics: Dating

no fap

This process changes – and usually improves – the life of every man who even attempts it. Here’s the best part: You can channel that change and focus it on your sex life, if you choose to, and it will get you laid. IF you do it correctly, that is…. and don’t cheat.

Here’s how: you have a primal, almost irresistible urge to procreate. That biological urge, when mixed with your testosterone, is intended to motivate you to jump out of bed in the morning ready to fight and fcuk your way through the herd, leaving vanquished foes and satiated hoes in your wake. Unfortunately, our advanced brains and opposable thumbs over time have discovered an almost perfect and flawless cheat: Masturbation. After all, it’s so much easier, so much less of a hassle, to simply cut all the corners, skip through the level, and polish that platinum trophy really fast until the end credits roll.

Here’s where this wonderful thing we’re discovering called NoFap comes in: You, being the horny, over-sexed, perverted woman crazy fiend that you are, have a choice in how you get off.: Your hand or a vagina. You may feel like only one of those choices is viable, but that’s merely because it’s the EASY choice, so it appears to be the preferred one. Guess what: If you actually stop jerking off, and I mean STOP – eliminate it as a possibilty from your life (as I and many others have) – your sex starved brain and testicles will literally lead you out into the world and between the legs of a female. It just HAPPENS. Try it, you numbskull. You’ll see that I speak the truth.

“But….but…. Chinesegangster, that’s easy for you to say but I have bad acne, back hair, a harelip, and my breath smells like a circus chimp’s used diaper!”

Fine. Lower your standards and look again. The only reason your standards are so irrationally high in the first place is because of that damn computer screen you’ve been sitting in front of half your life. Hint: now that you’re no longer wasting your life in your comfy jerk-off chair, you will have plenty of time to apply Clearasil, shave your ape nape, and brush your teeth. NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, THERE ARE REAL WOMEN OUT THERE WHO WILL HAVE SEX WITH YOU. They’re just waiting for you to poke your head into their personal space and say “Hello beautiful. You look bored. Can I help you with that?” Don’t believe me? Go to the Manga section at Barnes and Noble right now. There are three (3) nerdy girls on the floor at this very moment feeling lonely and unattractive, faces pressed into some crappy Japanese rape comic, dreaming of the day that someone like you comes along and says those exact words.

Stop mentally objecting to the wisdom of what I’m saying and automatically trying to make yourself the exception to this absolute rule. You’re not different, you’re not unique, and you’re not a hopeless case. You’re a MAN, and mother nature wants your penis to hang out inside wet vaginas. PORRN HAS BEEN COCKBLOCKING YOU FROM YOURSELF. SNAP OUT OF IT! Stop jerking off, and sex will happen to you. You will do it for yourself on an unconscious and biological level and you will literally marvel as it’s happening. And it will be FUN. Trust me, meeting and flirting with young women may be effort, but it sure as hell isn’t work.

I’m speaking undeniable truth here. This place has changed my life for the better, and I’m just like YOU.

(via)

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  • Volcrush

    damn bro you must have some serious issues if fapping affects you this much with women

  • Mmm5245

    i get laid probably 5 times a week, and still manage to honk my horn at least as much.  and work a full time job. 

    why is this an issue for you?

    • Froman

       cheers to that!

    • Froman

       cheers to that!

    • Froman

       cheers to that!

  • e-ronin

    Get it all the time and still enjoy a good fap on a regular basis. if we were not meant to do it our hands wouldn’t reach…
    This was probably written by some guilt ridden religious nut trying in a hip way to save people. Or it is a girl pretending to be a dude.

    Cheers

    • The Mouser

      Nah, I doubt it’s a girl. Because the only thing I’m dubious about is if you take this “no fap” shiet to an extreme, it sounds like a recipe for date rape ie “She talked to me all evening, and my balls were aching… she MUST have wanted it as much as me!”

      Moderation in all things, please… a lifetime getting your rocks off to pixels isn’t balanced, or conditioning yourself via extreme porrn so that only midget scat gangbangs can even tickle your tinkle – but I think the Catholic Church’s recent scandals show how twisted sexuality can become when there’s NO outlet, and how easy it becomes to justify targeting anyone vulnerable who happens to be close by.

    • Jack

      Well I don’t see myself putting my finger in my ass all day, just because my hand can reach it, “my hand can reach it, so its meant to be” retarted logic

  • Froman

    we get it, you’re not going to jerk it anymore. this is like the tenth article about not fapping I’ve read about on here. it’s getting old buddy

  • Froman

    we get it, you’re not going to jerk it anymore. this is like the tenth article about not fapping I’ve read about on here. it’s getting old buddy

  • Froman

    we get it, you’re not going to jerk it anymore. this is like the tenth article about not fapping I’ve read about on here. it’s getting old buddy

    • The Mouser

      Not sure about that:

      “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.”This is an idea, in a culture where more use of porrn is supposed to equal more sexual joy for men and women alike.I didn’t like the tone of this article at all (would you like the author to be driving the cab your daughter got into alone, or your sister, or mum?) but in our society it takes a brave person to criticise the use of anything that feels good, be it food, drink, or fap-fodder.

    • The Mouser

      Not sure about that:

      “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.”This is an idea, in a culture where more use of porrn is supposed to equal more sexual joy for men and women alike.I didn’t like the tone of this article at all (would you like the author to be driving the cab your daughter got into alone, or your sister, or mum?) but in our society it takes a brave person to criticise the use of anything that feels good, be it food, drink, or fap-fodder.

      • Anonymous

        I agree that it is admirable to stand up to those who advocate internet porrn. I personally avoid porrn. But I think masturbating is a perfectly normal and non-damaging thing to do. No one needs to attack it so violently.

        Not to mention how the author views women…………

    • The Mouser

      Not sure about that:

      “Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people.”This is an idea, in a culture where more use of porrn is supposed to equal more sexual joy for men and women alike.I didn’t like the tone of this article at all (would you like the author to be driving the cab your daughter got into alone, or your sister, or mum?) but in our society it takes a brave person to criticise the use of anything that feels good, be it food, drink, or fap-fodder.

  • I’m doing this now and it works so amazingly. You have so much energy and drive. Not just for women but for life itself. Fine you all can keep sedating yourselves. I’ll be building my empire. 

  • I’m doing this now and it works so amazingly. You have so much energy and drive. Not just for women but for life itself. Fine you all can keep sedating yourselves. I’ll be building my empire. 

  • anonymous

    search no fap on google and go to the bodybuilding thread. Over 10,000 posts

    • sik kunt

      its called misc phaggot. do u even lift fukwit?
      how dare you taint misc by even opening it.

  • Kendra

    I’m a girl, and trust me. We (well, most of us. Can’t speak for the full female race) don’t care if you jack off or not. So long that you’d make it seem that you prefer your hand over them. Girl’s are insecure about that lol.

  • McMcykeson

    Can the “No Fap” be use to get men cause I am gay as OP

  • Easy Ed

    I’m 69 years old and have a good sex life with younger women. I have been reading with interest this nofap regimen and will give it a try. I have been making myself happy all my life, and have had sex with women recently 3or 4 times a week, and so this nofap will be a new approach.
    Can it get any better? We will wait and see.

  • Joaquin Padilla Rivero

    Taking control of your own sexuality (masturbating) is, somehow, equal to never ever getting laid: this is an improvement vs “fapping makes you blind”, but oh well. The “solution” is to “lower your standards and try again”, which means, you should be open to going to bed with someone who doesn’t really attract you. What nice lessons to give!

  • Anonymous

    I am a man, but I am offended on behalf of all women by this article.

  • Jon

    What a load of crap. I’ve gone 8 weeks now and no positive results – certainly no women falling over themselves to sleep with me. Just a maddeningly strong sex drive.