14 Women Reveal Their Cringiest ‘Nice Guy’ Experience

April 18, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Dating

nice guy stories

1. The one that was the most upsetting was a guy who had been my friend for years, who I was close to and confided in, telling me my boyfriend at the time had cheated on me. I wanted to confront the boyfriend and this “friend” kept dissuading me, telling me to just drop contact with him, and trying to comfort me with physical contact.

Obviously I still confronted my boyfriend. He said no such thing happened. And it turned out my friend had made it all up.

 

2. I’m a girl, but this story is about my husband and how he caught the bad end of a “nice” guy.

A few years before I met my husband, he decided to go to a party. He gets there and some random girl walks up to him, says “Your cute” and kisses him. This amused him, so he started chatting with her. While chatting, he notices a very angry, short man standing next to her. The man is scowling at my husband and it’s making him uncomfortable. He can tell the guy is pissed at the attention girl is giving him, and it’s just not worth it, so he stops talking to random girl, turns away, and starts walking to another room. It’s at this point husband feels short man punch him in the back. When he turns around, short man is running away and actually runs out of the house and never returns to the party. Husband laughs it off, cause it wasn’t even a hard punch. But then somebody notices husband is bleeding, and there is a hole in his shirt. The short fucker hadn’t punched him, he stabbed him.

Random girl saw this all go down and was pretty mortified. Turns out the short dude was obsessed with her, they were “best friends”, and he accompanied her everywhere.

The knife was pretty small, so it didn’t do any real damage. But he still has the scar.

 

3. We met on OkCupid and after like 2 weeks decided to go meet. We both weren’t into coffee so we decided to eat a dinner together. At his place. We agreed to meet at the mall to buy groceries. He couldn’t decide even one thing, but when I would take a certain brand he would mention how his grandmother would take some other. At the end I made him to pick at least one thing – appetizer (thinking of soup or something), so he picked blueberries. I payed. We came to his apartment, he couldn’t cook which I didn’t mind, but he didn’t even feel like helping. While I was making the sauce he mentioned things like that I am not intelligent enough (because I suck at math and wasn’t interested in it when he was reading his math book to me for 5 – 10 minutes), that it annoys him me not being interested in video games, he blushed when I joked and said word “pussy” and also got frustrated when he read Jesenin to me and I wasn’t that interested. Then we finally sat and ate. He commented how his mother does it better. But he also ate pretty much everything. Then all of the sudden he stood up and said “now we should kiss and cuddle”. Of course not. I offered to wash the dishes. He didn’t even help. I felt sorry for him the entire time, that’s why I just didn’t leave.

 

4. Met a guy at college who seemed like a wayward out-of-towner that wasn’t having any luck in the friend department (word was he moved up from Cali). So we started working as semi-study buddies (he was taking courses for a different major but they were courses I had done already).

He knew I had a boyfriend but decided one day to ask me to dinner. I specified “as friends?” And his response was something like “sure, or it could be a date.” The fact that I was in a long term relationship didn’t seem to make a difference to him. So I declined.

After that my courses got switched to online courses, so I stopped seeing him as much. Until he added me on Facebook and started trying to ask me out again. I finally told him no, that if he couldn’t respect my current relationship enough to lay off the date attempts, that we didn’t need to be friends.

Then he went Uber religious on me. Started preaching at me constantly that he was “terrified about (my) destiny of going to hell” and wanted to “save (my) soul so that didn’t happen”. Basically just admonishing every single decision I ever made as a person and determined like no other to convince me that my sinful ways would undermine me in every way. Kept saying he didn’t want to see his “friend” go through that.

I told him forcing his religion down my throat was the surefire way of pushing me away permanently, and proceeded to block him. I gave him a lot of chances to understand that what he was doing wasn’t cool, but he was so convinced that he was just being a “nice guy”.

 

5. I went to school with a “nice guy”, neck-beard, anime katana sword wielding kinda guy.
He would talk about how girls only like the big jock guys and how they neglect the smart intellectuals like him. He also talked about how he was waiting for a girl to be smart enough and “good enough” for him. Which doesn’t make any sense at all but ok.

He weighed about 90 pounds, had vampire pale skin and bleach blond hair which he wore at an awkward too-long-in-the-front length so it could cover his eyes.

He started hanging around where I would eat lunch my freshman year of high school. No one wanted him around, but we were nice and we would just smile.

Anyway neckbeard would get waaaaay to close to me, making up reasons to touch me.

I am really short so he would set his arm on my head, grab my shoulders- just awkward unwanted touching.

So I told him to hey maybe don’t touch me. He did not get the message. In fact the not-so-sly hair smelling/ weird touching increased and I said zip cuz I was shy.

Well he got my number from one of my “friends” and started sending me those creepy asterisk messages.

Example

Hey good looking 😉 walks over to you and puts arm around you I missed you runs hand over your soft hair hugs you feeling your nice boobs press against my strong manly chest

I didn’t respond and they just got worse and worse. He sent me a shirtless photo that nearly blinded me. I texted him telling him what he was doing was making me uncomfortable but that didn’t stop him. He started asterisk texting me about how he was gonna rape me and how I was gonna call him daddy and like it.

I learned how to block someone on Verizon that day. I never told anyone about it. I had to go to four years of high school with this kid getting too close, making me so uncomfortable.

 

6. This actually just happened recently. My good friend from college and I, along with other friends from our program went out to a bar to celebrate finishing our degree. He kept feeding me shots but I figured everyone just wanted to be drunk and have a good time. The night is coming to an end and I’m quite incapacitated. My “good friend” frantically approaches me saying that he had just seen a guy put something in my drink (which I had just finished). He told me that I would soon be unconscious and it was best that he take me back to his apartment so he could take care of me. Being heavily drunk and also quite scared, I agreed and he helped me back to his apartment.

After making me something to eat and giving me some water, we set up camp for the night on his couch. He put on a movie and he said he would sit and watch me sleep to make sure I didn’t throw up or anything. As I started to dose off he started touching me, first on my feet and knees and then my upper thigh. I confronted him about it and he said after everything he had done he felt he deserved “compensation”. I laughed it off but after he tried to make a move again I got angry and we began fighting. He exposed to me that no one had put anything in my drink and it was all a ploy to allow him to make his move. After some more arguing he decided it was best I left, and he kicked me out of his apartment at 3:00 am while I was still considerably drunk.

This is someone whom I’ve trusted and spent 4 years being friends with. Safe to say I’ll be a lot more speculative with future male friends.

 

7. Pretended to be interested in me, we developed a great friendship 3 strong years at the time. Then I met my future husband, he noticed that I have never been so interested and in love with someone. He would comment sarcastically on our pictures on facebook. He then confessed his love for me and begs me to leave him by saying that he has put up with my shit for so long. In my defense, he never showed romantic interest. He lived in Texas, he drove all the way to California to bombard me at 3am, threatening to kill himself If i dont ever love him back, threatened to hurt my husband and such. I called the cops and now I have a restraining order against him.

 

8. I was friends with this guy for a couple years, but was never interested in dating him. I was fairly certain he was aware of that, and since he never said or did anything that seemed to me like he was interested in me either, I assumed we were legitimately friends. He never asked me out, he never made any comment even suggesting he wanted anything more. We were fairly close, and had a lot of mutual friends. I never thought anything else was going on.

Apparently, this was not the case. A couple days after I got a new boyfriend, I update my relationship status on Facebook. My “friend” calls me within like…2 minutes of this update, and immediately starts shouting at me, demanding to know why he “wasn’t good enough for me” and why my boyfriend “was so much better than him.” I tired to get him to calm down, but he just kept yelling about how he was a “nice guy” and how he had “always been so nice to me, why didn’t I ever give him a chance?” I calmly tried to explain to him that I never got any signals from him, and I didn’t think I ever did anything to lead him on or anything, and he shouted that “he’s such a nice guy and doesn’t deserve to be friend-zoned like this.”

I made one final attempt to salvage the conversation, and tried to explain that I was sorry if he felt deceived, but it also really hurt my feelings that I thought he legitimately valued me as a person and wanted to be my friend, but now he’s just mad I won’t sleep with him. He flat-out screamed at me “FUCK YOU! You’re just a cold bitch! I bet your boyfriend’s an asshole anyway!!!”

I hung up on him and he never spoke to me again. Two years of relatively close friendship down the drain in one phone call. It felt pretty shitty.

 

9. The first few days of my freshman year in college, before classes even started, I was really excited to get to meet new people. And I met lots of people. One of those people was this guy who lived in the dorm building next to mine, they were actually connected on the main floor. He was a “nice guy.” We talked about a bunch of stuff, he was a sophomore, gave me some tips on some professors, etc. He was telling me about some movie, I don’t even remember what it was now, but it sounded cool and I had never heard of it. We decided to go watch it in his dorm room. So we watch this movie (small dorm room, we sat on the bed because there’s nowhere else to sit). I go back to unpacking, talking to other people, all sorts of days before school starts things.

Except he decided that not only was watching a movie on his laptop a date, it was me agreeing to a deep relationship with him. I find out he’s told people we are dating. I quickly try to straighten it out, I tell him it wasn’t a date, and I’ve just gotten to school and am not about to jump into a relationship anyway. He cries and tells a bunch of people that I’m cruel and a terrible human being and basically stomped on his heart because I’m just that evil.

But then he apologizes, hopes we can just be friends. I can’t really avoid him so sure, we can be friends. Except then every time I’m in the same room as him he moves to stand next to me or sit next to me and scoot closer and closer. Then he starts “happening to be” places I am. If those places were the library or quad, sure. But those places are the stairwell that goes from my dorm to the main floor and outside. Because lots of people like to hang out in stairwells, particularly ones that don’t go anywhere they need to be. Or outside of a class I have he isn’t taking.

I talk to him again. Very clear. Do not want relationship. Do not want friendship if he cannot handle that. Want to be left alone. Why don’t I like him, “he’s a nice guy.” Nice guys don’t make me have this discussion. Nice guys do not wait for me in the damn stairwell.

We go through this cycle for the next year and a half. He leaves me alone for a little while, comes and apologizes for being inappropriate in the past, says he’s seeing a counselor, he didn’t get it before, he does now, he’s so sorry. Within a short period of time, like hours, he does something again, like walks over while and tries to “casually” put his arm around me. I stopped even saying “What the Hell?” when he did this, I just removed it and left. It got better the next year when our dorms were not close to each other but didn’t completely stop. It ended pretty badly.

He thought he was this misunderstood, nice guy. That I didn’t see who he was. I could see who he was. He was was an entitled, whiny, narcissistic stalker who made me have to constantly look over my shoulder.

 

10. I had one guy who had a crush on me completely stop talking to me when I started dating someone else, but on my birthday I got a huge box in the mail from him. It had a ton of weird stuff in it, bed sheets, a stuffed giraffe, an old journal from a young grade that they had to write in for points with new entries made about me (all written in his “kid” style), a framed collage of pictures of me and screenshots of our text conversations, a letter explaining the giraffe begged to be sent to me, as well as congratulating me on my 4 month anniversary.

I called him immediately to tell him that it was inappropriate and he called my boyfriend and got into a fight with him or something and then posted on facebook about how he “went out of his way to get a nice gift for a girl who didn’t appreciate it.”

 

11. A past co-worker had a huge crush on me. He was very sweet but I would ignore his incessant messaging and when he asked me if I received his messages that weekend, I came up with a basic excuse,”sorry but my phone is messed up and I don’t receive messages on time.” This fucking guy not only believes a terrible excuse, but he adds a phone line to his phone plan, gets a great quality, brand new goddamn phone and “surprises” me with it at the end of my shift. As he stands beside my car with a bulgy-eyed stuffed animal and a T-Mobile box, I wanted to crawl into a hole. Long story short, let him down easy and he cried. No he did not get watery-eyed, he fucking cried with snot coming out as I gave him a ride home because he had taken the bus for an added surprise so i wouldn’t suspect he was there. cringe

 

12. I went on some dates with a very nice guy (who naturally complained that girls didn’t like him because he was “too nice”). The problem was that his idea of nice was avoiding confrontation. I did something that upset him and instead of talking to me about it he sent me this insanely long text message that came through scrambled and I could barely read it. So I say come over and we will talk about it.

Shows up, says basically nothing even when I am asking pointed questions based on what I was able to decipher from this crazy long text.

Happened a second time and I gave up. He was nice but that definitely wasn’t the problem. It was that he never wanted to say something even mildly confrontational which meant we couldn’t ever talk about something we might disagree about. No way to move forward in a relationship like that.

So now I’m just one more woman who didn’t like him because he is “too nice.”

 

13.  I went on a date with a guy who did actually seem quite nice. Almost… too nice. Such as over the top compliments every few minutes, outright refusing to let me pay (I gave in because I didn’t want to argue in front of people) and agreeing with my opinion on absolutely everything.

At the end of the date I tell him that I’m sorry but I don’t want a second date, although I do agree to be friends when he asks if that’s ok. Friends actually goes well, we hang out a couple more times and he’s way less OTT.

Two weeks later I go away for a week to Auckland, and shag a guy I met online while up there. Come back, and a couple of days pass then I hang out with the first guy again. He asks how the trip went, I tell him what I got up to, and then… it gets creepy.

He tells me he can forgive me for cheating on him, because he knows I’m the one, and that we’re going to get married one day. As I’m sitting there with a look of WTF on my face, he continues that he understands that I only slept with someone because I needed a release since we hadn’t “consummated our future” yet, but perhaps it was time because he didn’t want us to get too old to be good parents (I was 20!)

I noped right the fuck out of there, and for the next month or so I swear I caught glimpses of him hanging round my work and home.

 

14. I had this friend in high school – and we’ll call him a “friend,” quotes and all, because I don’t talk to him anymore – who I’d thought was a pretty chill dude. He was kind of a dork and didn’t have a lot of friends, but I was kind of the same way so I could relate. Anyway, towards the beginning of our senior year of high school, I started steadily dating another friend of ours who had asked me out a few weeks before.

My “friend” flipped his lid.

Now, this “friend” had also asked me out on a couple of previous occasions, but I’d always declined because I didn’t see him as anything more than a buddy. So one evening I told him that I’d started dating this other person, and this guy just went off on me, claiming that he had more of a right to date me because he’d known me longer, that he’d been a good friend to me, the works. It was a royal mess. That “friendship” somehow lasted another two years. I finally cut it off at the knees because he was an emotionally manipulative jerk who kept trying to horn in on my relationships and got jealous when I made new friends. Last year I dropped him like a bad habit and have never felt better.