The Daily Man-Up: 20 Lessons to Learn About Women And Dating

October 3, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Dating, Man-Up

(photo: @manuelmeurisse)

Lesson 1: The #1 Myth About What Women Really Want Debunked

Men often think they can’t have the women they want because they don’t have enough money or good enough looks.

Let’s be real – money and good looks will get the woman’s attention, but that is all. It’s like a nice billboard advertisement it gets your attention but it doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll buy the product. The media has done a great job at making you believe in the erroneous assumption that money and six pack abs is the path to get your dream girl.

When you use money to take a woman out to nice dinners and to buy her gifts too early in the relationship, the woman will begin to think the man is trying to BUY her affection. Women see this as manipulation… and a LACK OF CONFIDENCE. Both of these are instant attraction killers. The woman may still answer your calls and let you take her out, but that is simply because she enjoys free stuff.

And who doesn’t?! Think about it.

You take this woman out and buy her stuff. You take her to a nice dinner. And then she heads home and meets the guy she really wants to be with. This guy does nothing for her except hang out, have fun with her and build tension yet he is the one taking her home while the other guy just dropped $150+ in one night on a date that lasted 1.5 hours.

After a certain point, money is meaningless. It ceases to be the goal. The game is what counts. – Aristotle Onassis

Women want men who have the confidence to know that he can have a good time with her without pulling out his wallet for everything. Very few men know this, and guy who worked his tail off for the sole purpose of attracting women through power cannot even comprehend this fact. If you spend too much money on a woman or do too many favors for her, you are subtly telling her that your pocketbook is ALL YOU HAVE TO OFFER.

And if she actually likes this then my advice to men is: RUN!

Personality is the key to being good with women and dating. It’s organic, it’s natural, and it’s who you are.

Deep down, women are attracted to your personality more-so than any other trait of a man. When you build up your personality you simultaneously increase your attractiveness.

Lesson 2: How To Take Women Off The Pedestal And Reclaim Your Masculinity

When you ask a woman what she want’s in a man one of the first thing she’ll say is “a nice guy”. Yes, it’s what women want, but it’s not what they respond to. And I am not suggesting that you go completely 180 right now and turn into an arrogant jerk either.

Ok, you’ve eaten a Snickers bar right? Deep down in there is the soft chewy center of a man. It’s not a bad thing to be soft and vulnerable inside, but just be aware that women are not necessarily ATTRACTED to the soft, limp man until she’s first seen the HARD side of him and knows it’s there.

Because when you’re soft (expressing feminine character), you put the woman in a masculine role. Typically, a woman can only feel attraction for a man when she is in her feminine, therefore as a man you need to step into the masculine dominant role more.

You become soft because you have the scarcity mentality. You’re not thinking about the big picture. You think there are just a few women out there and there’s nothing you can do about it. You think: “There is NOBODY out there for me so I better treat this one girl amazing because I don’t know if and when I will ever experience this again”.

Having a low opinion of yourself is not “modesty”. It’s self-destruction. Holding your uniqueness in high regard is not “egotism”. It’s a necessary precondition to happiness and success. – Bobbe Sommer

When you start thinking like this, you start liking girls that remotely show any signs of interest in you. You think you can’t create that same connection with another girl, so you settle for less than you deserve without even realizing it

YOU NEED TO REMOVE THE SCARCITY MENTALITY FROM YOUR LIFE AND SWITCH TO THE ABUNDANCE MENTALITY.

It is strictly social conditioning.

There is more than one girl that you can have this feeling with. In fact, there are billions of women out there. And you can date these women when you take women off the pedestal you hand crafted out of gold for her.

Stop placing women on pedestals!

It doesn’t serve you and women don’t like it in the long run.

Check this out: Let’s say you meet a guy as a friend and then after only a few days he started buying you a bunch of stuff and paying for all your food and drinks. Then texts to make sure you got home ok, and “likes” all your facebook posts. Sends you random gifts. What a weird dude…

Do you know what the pedestal does? It allows women to recline into the comfort you lavish them with, put their foot in your mouth that gives too many fake compliments, buys too many gifts, always being available and lets her walk all over you. Too early man it’s over before it started…

You minus well lay on the floor and tell her to walk all over you!

Always be a gentleman, and don’t be a little boy. Women will only respect you for how much you respect yourself.

Believe it or not, women hate being put on a pedestal! When you put women on pedestals, you see them as an overly valued commodity and not as a regular human being, which further pushes her away and into the arms of another man who respects himself.

Put yourself in the woman’s shoes…

Imagine a woman chasing you. She is constantly calling you. Every morning you get a text and you only hung out twice. She gets upset when you hang with your friends and you are not even dating. She left you an emotional voice mail when you forgot to respond to her text one time…This girl is crazy right? That’s the same as the nice needy guy. Don’t be that guy!

Nothing scares a woman off faster than a guy who becomes emotionally involved way too quickly. It is desperate, and makes the girl think: “What is wrong with this guy? Why is he in love with me already? Why is he pausing his life for me when we just met?

Something must be wrong with him she’ll think.

The guys that care too much lowers his own value and doesn’t create sentiments of allure because guys that care too much are telling women– through concern, through availability, through his being there too much- that he is in fact, not special or unique at all. He is just kind of there. He is more available than hydrogen, more common than dirt, and freer to talk to than the operator at Home Depot – but a smooth operator he is not..

Ultimately, the girl wants the guy that doesn’t need her to be happy, but wants her to be apart of his life.

Ideally, the guy wants her really bad. But NEVER should he want her so much that he’ll start putting her on a pedestal and start valuing her over himself and his own life.

She’ll run faster than Usain Bolt in the Olympics and any person who has respect for himself would do the same.

Check out the rest of the article here