Life Experiences

What’s It Like To Go To Harvard

April 12, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

Harvard is a very extreme place. You go there and everyone is extremely smart, extremely driven, extremely focused on attaining their goals. It is so extreme that it can become scary sometimes. When you have a bunch of people with high intelligence, but who are not necessarily mature or moral, you can get some pretty nasty results (that’s how you get so many insecure, bright students going into Wallstreet to make a lot of money even though it’s screwing everyone else over). 

Even the clubs are extreme. You don’t just write for the newspaper. You have to go through a semester long competitive process to be selected into the Crimson. And after that, if you want to do well in the Crimson, you have to work your ass off and neglect your studies to be considered a true trooper. Kids here consider their extracurriculars a job. All social interactions have some sort of shady networking pre-professional slime to them.  

A lot of students are really full of themselves. They spend all their time climbing the ladders of success and trying to win everything. Everyone is super busy all the time. You have to arrange lunches with your friends about two weeks in advance. 

Harvard is not the type of place where you backstab your friend, but if your friend fell in a race, you would keep on running and not bend down to help. Students, for the most part, are only interested in their own benefit and will do things that look good, rather than things that are good. 


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Confessions Of A Former Navy SEAL

April 4, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

Why did you become a Navy Seal?

I have struggled with this question for a long time. To be brutally honest I would say insecurity. I had to prove something to myself. I chose SEAL training because it was regarded as the hardest thing you could do. To answer the next logical question here, yes I did prove it to myself and I a have lost quite a bit of my insecurity.

Did you do anything to prepare for the training before you joined?

I ran track in high school. My advice is run a lot. Run in soft sand if you can. Check out Crossfit too, it is actually some good stuff. The Crossfit football program will make you vomit blood, but it will get you in shape. DO NOT start the football version without doing the regular version for a while first.

What was your most difficult moment during training and how did you overcome it?

Thursday of hell week we were sitting in the water in the bay. It was freezing and I literally felt like I was going to die. Everything was going numb and I felt a small bit of life left in my chest. It felt like a ball of life and it was getting smaller. I overcame it by simply accepting that I was going to die before I quit. I should probably note that I had been hallucinating for over a day at this point.


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Confessions Of A Retired Bank Robber

March 29, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

What made you get into bank robbery?

Bank robbery is the real American Dream. We make movies about it, and as long as innocent people aren’t hurt or killed, our society loves bank robbers.

Also, it seemed like a worthy challenge. I thought it would be quite an accomplishment if I could solve the puzzle and figure out how to get away with it.

Did you have a mentor of sorts that you learned from or did you have a community of bank robbers that you would talk to?

Only the Internet. I studied countless reports of other robberies that had gone wrong and people who were caught. I never told anyone what I was doing. One of the main things I learned from research was that an overwhelming number of people are caught because they didn’t do it solo. So I never let anyone (not even my wife or best friend) know what I was doing.

How much planning did you do before robbing a bank?

I researched for about five or six months prior to my first one. I studied mostly the things that people did to get caught, and I just tried to plan around those things. It’s hard to know how people get away since those details rarely make it to the news, but studying how people get caught was incredibly helpful in knowing what to avoid.

Once I did my first bank, very little planning was needed for subsequent banks. I never really scoped out a particularly location other than to make sure there was parking that was out of view from the bank.


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Confessions Of A Former Drug Mule

March 21, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

Why did you get into this business?

The city I live in is extremely corrupt. I’ll be honest, I was living at home, working a minimum wage job, paying too much money a month for a decent car (2014 25k car), I was struggling financially overall. I had a hunger for money and power, ultimately leading me to find someone who could get me in, a “recruiter” if you will.

How did you get into this business?

I went to someone in the business. It took me 6 months before he offered me a job

How did you find this guy?

He ended up being a friend of a friend. It took him 6 months to offer me a job because the way I approached him was highly unusual.

Which cartel did you work for?

Cartel del Golfo (Gulf Cartel)

What were the top commodities of your cartel when you were in? 

Coke, weed and meth. I never touched meth, that was a whole different league.

What were the wholesale prices of the drugs you were smuggling?

The price of one brick if cocaine in southern Texas/ California is about 19k. In Pittsburgh it’s about 38k.


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What Is Doctor Assisted Death Like?

March 14, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

(photo: @cristian_newman)

An immediate family member last year was diagnosed with bronchiolitis obliterans (popcorn lungs) with an unknown cause to it. It is something that is not curable. As someone who was a daily part of my life it was hard to watch the condition progress.

His condition progressively got worse and he was transferred to a palativcare physicality a couple of weeks ago. He wasn’t happy living the way he was living and slowly dying. The doctors discussed with him the option of assisted death… something he did not know about, and myself I thought was still not finalized in Canada yet, so it was a surprise to hear this.

After a long discussion with the family and doctors, he signed the papers a week ago to start the process. He wanted to end his life and do away with the suffering and the suffering to come.

So yesterday (Saturday) afternoon was the scheduled day for this to happen. The day started like any other for him… he was very upbeat, laughing, and smiling. All of his close love ones we’re around that morning. We spent hours talking, playing crib, and going through some old memories.


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What Is It Like To Be Stupid?

March 12, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

george bush

The following is a very unusual account of a true but unusual experience:

I had an arterial problem for a couple of years, which reduced blood supply to my heart and brain and depleted B vitamins from my nerves (to keep the heart in good repair). Although there is some vagueness as to the mechanisms, this made me forgetful, slow, and easily overwhelmed. In short, I felt like I was stupid compared to what I was used to, and I was.

It was frightening at first because I knew something wasn’t right but didn’t know what, and very worrying for my career because I was simply not very good any more.

However, once I got used to it and resigned myself, it was great. Even though I knew I had a worrying illness, I was happy as a pig in mud. I no longer had the arrogance of being frustrated with slow people, I abandoned many projects which reduced a lot of stress, I could enjoy films without knowing what would happen (my nickname before this used to be ‘comic book guy’ if you get the reference), and I became amazingly laid back and happy go lucky. I got on with people much better. I developed much more respect for one of my friends in particular who I always considered slow – it turned out he is much deeper than I thought, I just never had the patience to notice before. You could say I had more time to look around. The world just made more sense. The only negative, apart from struggling to perform at work, and having to write everything down, was that I no longer found sci-fi interesting – it just didn’t seem important. (I’m not joking, although it sounds like a cliché.)


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What’s It Like To Take Part In An Ayahuasca Ceremony?

March 8, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

The first time I heard about Ayahuasca was in a Rolling Stone article and it did not paint a pretty picture: sitting blindfolded in a dark room, puking into buckets, and wearing adult diapers. I suppose in an attempt at journalistic fairness the author talked about both the psychedelic wonders of the experience and also the corridors of hell. I found the article terrifying.

A year or so later a close friend of mine had his own experience with the spirit vine and upon telling me about his beautiful adventures he continually prodded me, “When are you going to drink Ayahuasca?” In my mind, not soon, but now at least I had an invitation. Through my ongoing spiritual journey I learned more about the “Grandmother” and after about two years of education I decided it was time for a visit. I asked my friend if he could help arrange an upcoming session and two months later I found myself in an Ayahuasca healing ceremony with a Peruvian Shaman direct from the Amazon. 


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Confessions Of A Former Klansman

March 6, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

interview with former klansman

Who brought you into the fold of white supremacy?

I was introduced to racist ideology around the age of 14, by some other teenagers who were skinheads. I never really joined, but I shaved my head and put boots on. Not necessarily because I believed any of it. I thought it made me look edgy and tough. I moved from my all white semi rural town at 19 to an outlying suburb near a predominantly black inner city area. This is where I dealt with my first encounters with African Americans. After some ugly altercations and having a few guns stuck in my face, my immature mind decided that because I had dealt with some black people who happened to be bad, all black people must be bad. I found Klan contacts on a WN message board and reached out.

What sort of views did you hold about those of other races compared to your own? Were those outside of the WS/KKK movement seen as inferior physically, intellectually, or otherwise even if they were your own race?

There are varying degrees of this. A few get really into the whole Ubermensch thing. For the most part I was more of a segregationist. I didn’t necessarily think whites were by nature better, but that we should live separately from other races. Toward the end, I became more irrational and hate driven.


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What’s It Like To Be A Sugar-Daddy?

February 28, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences, main |

Most people who hear about older men paying for the loving of a younger woman assume it’s prostitution, or at least prostitution lite. Because you’re essentially paying for sex. What’s the difference?

Well, I’m not picking a girl up off the street. It’s not like I’m getting a street hooker. I suppose there could be a fine line. But I see these girls, I get to know them, and I do things financially for them. If I was married, I would probably do the same. I’m seeing a girl who needs stability, and I’m helping her out. Although if there wasn’t sex involved, would I do it? Probably not. 

When did you become a sugar daddy? Was there a certain point in your life when you decided that relationships were getting too complicated?

Probably three years ago. Maybe longer. And it really does simplify things, and it takes the stresses and strains out of it. Because if I was in a normal relationship, there are more things to think about. With this, I know what the deal is. The girls know why I’m with them. 


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What Is Daily Life Like With Alzheimer’s Disease?

February 27, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Life Experiences |

This is an excellent question, and one I’ve considered often in the last decade-plus of working with such folks.

First, it depends upon the stage of dementia: mild, moderate, or severe.

In mild dementia, it seems to be like being a functional alcoholic’s day, as far as cognition goes. You’re able to do what you need to do, but some little things get missed, such as your T-shirt is on backward, but you don’t notice, or you can’t find the sugar bowl, so you start taking apart cupboards and end up going without coffee and the kitchen is a mess. Later, you swear you did not do that. You have no memory of doing it, and the more another person argues that you did indeed make that mess, the angrier you get. You did not. He or she is lying.

The whole day goes like this—close to normal, but not quite. Routines are easy, but anything new is more difficult. And, if asked about someone or thing from earlier in the day, you may or may not remember the event. By the end of the day, you’re tired of thinking, but your brain keeps throwing up odd thoughts and ideas—things like, “I can’t find the car keys. Someone must have stolen them! I need the car keys.” You may wander, rummage, pull things out of drawers for a couple hours, at the end of which you may be unable to tell anyone what it was you were searching for. Even more telling, you may not have driven a car for the past five years.


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