Have you ever heard of The Curse of the Traveler?
An old vagabond in his 60s told me about it over a beer in Central America, goes something like this: The more places you see, the more things you see that appeal to you, but no one place has them all. In fact, each place has a smaller and smaller percentage of the things you love, the more things you see. It drives you, even subconsciously, to keep looking, for a place not that’s perfect (we all know there’s no Shangri-La), but just for a place that’s “just right for you.” But the curse is that the odds of finding “just right” get smaller, not larger, the more you experience. So you keep looking even more, but it always gets worse the more you see. This is Part A of the Curse.
Part B is relationships. The more you travel, the more numerous and profoundly varied the relationships you will have. But the more people you meet, the more diffused your time is with any of them. Since all these people can’t travel with you, it becomes more and more difficult to cultivate long term relationships the more you travel. Yet you keep traveling, and keep meeting amazing people, so it feels fulfilling, but eventually, you miss them all, and many have all but forgotten who you are. And then you make up for it by staying put somewhere long enough to develop roots and cultivate stronger relationships, but these people will never know what you know or see what you’ve seen, and you will always feel a tinge of loneliness, and you will want to tell your stories just a little bit more than they will want to hear them. The reason this is part of the Curse is that it gets worse the more you travel, yet travel seems to be a cure for a while.
None of this is to suggest that one should ever reduce travel. It’s just a warning to young Travelers, to expect, as part of the price, a rich life tinged with a bit of sadness and loneliness, and angst that’s like the same nostalgia everyone feels for special parts of their past, except multiplied by a thousand.
Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.
Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.
Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.
Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.
By John Brhel
Listen up, cause I’ve figured out who’s been keeping you from achieving all of your goals, from realizing all of your hopes and dreams, from securing your dream job or scoring a date with that cute redhead who sits in the next cubicle over. He’s been right under your nose this whole time, holding you back from working hard, from pushing yourself to be all you can be. Are you ready?
Drumroll, please. It’s…………….YOU!
Stop blaming your life circumstances, your appearance, your height, your lack of a prep school education, your horrible dancing skills, etc., etc., etc. and stop taking responsibility for your own actions. If you’re not where you want to be in life and you’re not giving it your all, the only one you have to blame is yourself.
No one is going to push you to become better than you already are. Did anyone force Einstein to come up with the general theory of relativity or John Lennon to write brilliant pop songs? No! Guys who get things done do so by their own volition. Okay, some may have it easier than others. Some guys are born rich, handsome, famous, etc., but all of us have the potential to reach great heights if we try.
Who’s in control of your destiny? If you believe in fate and just think life’s going to work itself out for you, good luck with that. If you don’t want to end up waiting around for life to happen to you, you’ve got to take the wheel and drive.
You can either be your best ally or your own worst enemy. You can be an independent, responsible man and take action to better your situation or you can keep playing the blame game, keep procrastinating, and keep living a dull, unfulfilled life.
No one, not your dad, girlfriend, professor, boss, etc. is your keeper. If you’re not living up to your full potential, you can’t blame your manager or your well-off friend for your own lack of success. That’s the easy way out, and it’s the one that will keep you where you are.
The only one keeping you from succeeding is that dude in the mirror, that lowly bastard who isn’t doing all he can. He’s the one who’s not taking the steps to achieve your goals. He’s the one who’s skipping class, not working out, sleeping in, feeling sorry, etc.
Now that you know the culprit, what are you going to do about him? Are you going to sit back and let him win or are you going to take charge? Do you want to be looking at a sorry loser or a go-getting winner the next time you go to shave? The choice is yours alone.
You can either be the person that keeps you from succeeding or the one who propels you to success. No one else is holding you back; don’t hold yourself back either. Be the guy you want to be and the other guy won’t know what hit him.
It’s Stories Like These That Prevent Me From Becoming A Hermit And Completely Turning My Back On Humanity
Here’s the backstory from Autism Speaks:
Our son, Daniel, is 5. He has autism. What started out as a fear has turned into a fascination. I showed him a YouTube video of a garbage truck a couple of years ago and he’s been obsessed ever since. Like many children on the autism spectrum, this has become a ritual for him. He loves the predictable movement of the hoist and is excited by the entire spectacle. He waits all week for Monday morning pickup. He knows exactly which cans are being picked up each week, and Sundays are special for him when he takes the cans out with his dad. Our recycle man, known only to us as Manuel, is his favorite. He always has a big smile for Daniel, who is faithfully waiting for him every Monday. To him, trash pickup is like a symphony. He synchronizes his hand movements with the truck. We have so many ‘Trash Day’ videos, but this one is like no other.”
We need more Manuels in the world and less bankers