Man-Up

The Daily Man-Up

June 29, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

The metaphor of  the road to success being a mountain isn’t right.

There is no end. Thinking that there is takes you away from that thing that’s sharpening you, strengthening you, making you tougher, and that thing is the grind, it’s the process, it’s the minutia and the struggle of a life that’s ambitious.

To expect the grind to dissipate is to desire and end to that thing that makes you better. To rest on top of a mountain and to think you’re done is to finish life, it’s to give up or give in.

You’re not working to some end. You’re not hustling trying to find a place in the sun, a place of silence and peace. No, you’re hustling because you love the hustle, you see the good in it, the necessity of it.

To be great is to forego the mindset of the many and acquire the hard view, the torturous view that every damn day you’re going to wake up and thrive at what others run from; the struggle, the hustle, the pain that makes weak men strong and strong men great.

YOU’RE GOING TO GET MORE FROM THE STRUGGLE THAN YOU GIVE TO IT.

The struggle gives, it doesn’t take. It seems like it’s breaking you down, and it may be, but you decide whether it makes you stronger or if it defeats you.

If you have any ounce of ambition or pride you’re going to guarantee that it doesn’t consume you but that you use it daily to become stronger and harder.

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The Daily Man-Up

June 28, 2017 | 1 Comment » | Topics: Man-Up |

He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has. ~ Epictetus

Advertising is all around us and it rarely seems like advertising at all. We’re shown what we should aspire to have when our friend buys a new car. We’re told what to buy and what to desire when we watch a TV show.

A life of consumption is a life of dependence. How can a man be free if he’s dependent on the rush of a purchase?

Power comes from being self-reliant and being in control of your desires. It’s becoming more and more difficult, to be in control, to know what’s real and what’s not, or what’s needed and what isn’t.

The vision or the ideal you’re being pitched by your pal, your neighbor, or your TV screen isn’t real. It’s now what you should want because it isn’t the thing that will get you what you want.

What you want is power, freedom, accomplishment, and happiness.

A purchase cannot do that. What you do not have cannot do that.

Everything you need is within your brain and your soul and it’s your job to figure out how to bring it about.

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The Daily Man-Up

June 27, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

They all believe that if they are “good” and do everything “right,” they will be loved, get their needs met, and have a problem-free life. This attempt to be good typically involves trying to eliminate or hide certain things about themselves (their mistakes, needs, emotions) and become what they believe others want them to be (generous, helpful, peaceful, etc.). I call these men Nice Guys. Up to now we haven’t paid much attention to the Nice Guy, but he is everywhere. He is the relative who lets his wife run the show. He is the buddy who will do anything for anybody, but whose own life seems to be in shambles. He is the guy who frustrates his wife or girlfriend because he is so afraid of conflict that nothing ever gets resolved. He is the boss who tells one person what they want to hear, then reverses himself to please someone else. He is the man who lets people walk all over him because he doesn’t want to rock the boat. He is the dependable guy at church or the club who will never say “no,” but would never tell anyone if they were imposing on him. He is the man whose life seems so under control, until BOOM, one day he does something to destroy it all.

Every Nice Guy is unique, but all have a cluster of similar characteristics. These traits are the result of a script, often formed in childhood, that guides their lives. While other men may have one or two of these traits, Nice Guys seem to possess a significant number.

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The Daily Man-Up

June 26, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

Have you ever held back from making a change or taking a chance, afraid of what might happen if you did? Have you ever stayed silent when there was something you really wanted to say, scared of ruffling feathers or being rejected? Have you ever thought to yourself, I wish I just had the guts?

If you have, you’re not alone.

As human beings, we’re wired for caution. We steer away from situations that expose us to the possibility of failing, losing face or feeling foolish. Our desire for safety and certainty pulls hard against our desire for growth and adventure.

If only I had the courage, we often say to ourselves, as though courage is something only a lucky few are endowed with. But that’s not true. Within you lies all of the courage you will ever need—to make that change or take that chance—in your work, relationships and life.

You just haven’t learned how to access it. Yet.

I know this because I’ve spent much of my life learning how to find my courage and rise above the fear that can so easily rob us of our freedom and hold our happiness hostage. From dealing with the challenges I never would have chosen (an armed robbery and numerous family tragedies) to those I’ve willingly taken on (having four children in five years while moving around the world) I’ve discovered that courage is a skill, and like all skills, it can be learned and mastered. I’ve spent years working with everyone from CEOs to trailblazing entrepreneurs to prove this.

Think of courage as a muscle. If you’ve never lifted weights, even the smallest weights will be challenging in the beginning. But if you keep working out, over time you’ll increase your capacity to lift heavier ones. Each time you act in the presence of fear, you dilute its power and grow your own.

But how do you move beyond the bumper stickers and T-shirt slogans that say Just Do It, Live Strong or Be Brave? How do you actually take that audacious leap of faith over a seemingly giant chasm of fear? This six-step guide will inspire you to go from fearful to brave in the face of risk.

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The Daily Man-Up

June 23, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

Since the Second World War when many of our Greatest Generation went off to battle and came back as hardened men, we haven’t had male initiation rites, at least not in the West, where a boy doesn’t know specifically when he’s become a man.

Childhood, actually, is extended. We go to school after we’ve graduated from another form of school and we’re not completely asked to grow up until we’re in our late twenties, and even then, “men” can go on acting as though they’re boys, bucking responsibilities and the pride that men once carried around in order to further extend their childhood well into their thirties and sometimes beyond.

Men don’t know when they’ve become men, and the masculine values that were once widespread have also come under attack, largely in the name of an eschewed fairness and political correctness that men have, by-in-large, just gone along with. The results are interesting…

The men that built our cities are no longer being produced. The men that defended our nations, while they still exist, are fewer. Men that were once leaders in communities are afraid to lead, to speak up, and to act like men. We’re being feminized from our hormones to our hearts, and articles like this help define those things that men once again need to possess, those characteristics that society once again needs to possess and appreciate or the structures, both literal and metaphorical, that were built by men, and the cities that were defended by good men against bad men, will surely once again fall.

We’re not doomed. This emasculation of men isn’t to say that men are no longer men, but the realities are there. Men are producing less testosterone, so the emasculation isn’t purely a matter of morals and values as it extends to the biological. Men can’t be men, because to be a man, in some ways, is to be assertive and strong and to lead with clarity, and some think that this hardheartedness is archaic and often unfair.

With all of that, we have the opportunity to stand up, improve, and make the life we want to make like never before. Like never before in the history of this planet has our outcome in life been more in our hands. Birth-rite no longer dictates where we’ll end, only where we’ll begin, and a man with this much power must seize it if he’s going to be and feel like the man his spirit calls him to become.

And so, a list of characteristics of a real men….

Check out the rest of the article at here

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The Daily Man-Up

June 22, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

A big part of who you become in life has to do with who you choose to surround yourself with.  Sometimes luck controls who walks into your life, but you decide who you let stay, who you pursue, and who you let walk back out.

Ultimately, you should surround yourself with people who make you a better person and let go of those who don’t.  Here are some warning signs you’re in the presence of the latter:

1.  They only make time for you when it’s convenient for them.

It’s obvious, but any relationship without regular interaction and communication is going to have problems, especially when there’s a lack of commitment.

Don’t waste your time with someone who only wants you around when it’s convenient for them.  You shouldn’t have to force someone to make a space in their life for you, because if they truly care about you they will gladly create space for you.

Being in a relationship with someone who overlooks your worth isn’t loyalty, it’s stupidity.  Never beg someone for attention.  Know your self-worth, and move on if you must.

2.  They hold your past against you.

Some people will refuse to accept that you are no longer who you used to be – that you’ve made mistakes in the past, learned from them, and moved past them.  They may not be able to stand the fact that you’re growing and moving on with your life, and so they will try to drag your past to catch up with you.  Do not  help them by acknowledging their negative behavior.  Keep moving forward.

Holding on to the unchangeable past is a waste of energy and serves no purpose in creating a better day today.  If someone continuously judges you by your past and holds it against you, you might have to repair your future by leaving them behind.

3.  You feel trapped.

Healthy relationships keep the doors and windows wide open.  Plenty of air is flowing and no one feels trapped.  Relationships thrive in this kind of unrestricted environment.  You can come and go as you please, but you choose to stay because where you are is where you want to be.

If you want to be a part of someone’s life, all the open doors and windows in the world won’t make you leave.  If someone has closed them all in an effort to trap you into something you don’t want to be a part of, it’s time to find the strength to kick down the door. 

Check out the rest of the article at Marc And Angel

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The Daily Man-Up

June 21, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

“Success” isn’t just having lots of money. Many people with lots of money have horribly unhappy and radically imbalanced lives.

Success is continuously improving who you are, how you live, how you serve, and how you relate.

So why won’t most people be successful?

Why don’t most people evolve?

The more evolved you become, the more focused you must be on those few things which matter most. Yet, as Jim Rohn has said, “A lot of people don’t do well simply because they major in minor things.”

To be successful, you can’t continue being with low frequency people for long periods of time.

You can’t continue eating crappy food, regardless of your spouse’s or colleague’s food choices.

Your days must consistency be spent on high quality activities.

The more successful you become — which is balancing the few essential things (spiritual, relational, financial, physical) in your life and removing everything else — the less you can justify low quality.

Before you evolve, you can reasonably spend time with just about anyone.

You can reasonably eat anything placed in front of you.

You can reasonably justify activities and behaviors that are, frankly, mediocre.

As your vision for yourself expands, you realize you have to make certain adjustments. You need to cut-back on spending all of your money and time on crap and entertainment. You have to save more, and invest more in your education and your future.

The more successful you become, the less you can justify low quality. The more focused you must become. The more consistently your daily behaviors must be high quality — and increasingly higher quality.

This isn’t about perfection. It’s definitely not about being busy all the time. Actually, the balance of true success involves what Tim Ferriss calls “mini-retirements” or regular sabbaticals.

Yet, if your daily behaviors are consistently low quality, what do you expect your life’s output to be?

Your choices must become higher quality.

Your relationships must become higher quality.

Every area of your life affects every other area of your life. Hence the saying, How you do anything is how you do everything. This is very high level thinking. It only makes sense for people who have removed everything from their lives they hate. To actually live this principle: your daily and normal life can only be filled with those things you highly value.

Check out the rest of the article at Thrive

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The Daily Man-Up

June 20, 2017 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

Embrace the struggle; the harder it is, the more you gain from it. The more you test yourself and are required to push yourself, the tougher you become, the greater your capacity for effort becomes. It’s in the struggle that we grow and evolve, yet so many of us distract ourselves from the struggle instead of embracing it and rejoicing in it.

Harsh times aren’t curses, they’re blessings, gifts that are bestowed upon us and they’ll lead us to greatness if we see them as such. So many, though, see them not as challenges, but as curses. They compare their hardships to the cushy lives that others aim to portray. They see the hours they have to spend working to yield little results while others are traveling and partying and lying on beaches, sun-hat on head, Corona in hand.

You need to embrace the struggle, to flee from it is to fail, it’s to weaken your resolve and relegate yourself to what can only be a shell of the life you have it within you to lead. We aren’t born with this understanding, it’s something we have to learn and we usually discover its necessity through failure.

I’ve failed more than I’ve won and every time I’ve failed its the work and the persistence after that failure that created something good from it. It’s the struggle that came after the fall, the climb back from the abyss, that not only made me tougher, but generated some kind of victory that could not have been without a sadistic love for the struggle, for a prolonged focus on a single thing and an avoidance of avoidance.

If you are to be anywhere near what you can be, you must seek to forge your potential within the fire of the struggle, within the flames of hard work and persistence because there is no other way.

Check out the rest of the article at Chad Howse

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