The Daily Man-Up: Victim To Victor

October 16, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

When Nick Santonastasso was born, he was given a 30% chance of surviving birth. One of only 12 people in the world born with Hanhart Syndrome – an extremely rare genetic disorder that caused Nick to be born with no legs, only one arm, and one finger. Growing up was hard, and Nick found himself self-loathing and thinking about ending his life.

However, more than just surviving, Nick found his WHY when he became a high school wrestler and professional bodybuilder. Now, he is sharing his experience with people all over the world as a keynote speaker at schools, non-profits, as well as Fortune 500 companies.

This condition hasn’t kept Santonastasso from living life to the fullest. He says he owes his success to this simple motto that helped him overcome failure and doubt: “It’s not can’t, it’s how.”

“Most people start with ‘can’t.’ Instead, look at the situation, take a deep breath and say, ‘Okay, how am I going to conquer this? How am I going to break through this barrier?”

“My parents sat me down and said ‘Nick, the world’s not going to stop for you because you’re born like this. Mom and dad are not going to be here forever, you’re going to have to figure out how to do each and everything your way,'” he recalls.

Accepting life’s challenges helped Santonastasso build resilience.

“I’m capable of what everyone else is,”

"I just want people to look at the world differently,” Santonastasso says. “I could sit here in this chair and moan and complain about being born with no legs and one arm. Or I could go do something about it. I could go make something of it."

Check out his new book Victim to Victor: How to Overcome the Victim Mentality to Live the Life You Love

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The Daily Man-Up: 8 Habits that Separate the Grounded Men from the Boys

October 15, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @timmarshall)

The most basic distinction between boys and grounded men is that boys act on feelings, men act on vision.

Boys are like a feather in the wind. They allow their emotional state to govern their actions and they decide whether or not to keep their commitments in the heat of the moment.

If they don’t feel like doing something then they don’t.

Boys will hit snooze on their alarm instead of waking up early and doing what needs to be done. They will show up late to meetings. They will procrastinate on their work. They will defer what they should do for what they want to do in the moment.

Men are different.

Men create a crystal clear vision for their future and then base every action on that vision.

It doesn’t matter if a man wants to eat another piece of cake, smoke that cigarette, or sleep in an extra 50 minutes. He knows the vision that he has for his life and he isn’t willing to compromise his future success for pleasure in the present moment.


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The Daily Man-Up: What Does Confidence Look Like To A Woman?

October 11, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @mehdizadeh)

Physically, confident guys are much more calm or deliberate in their movements. There’s not tonnes of figiting etc. They just seem to be able to settle into a position and become relaxed. This also goes for walking – which comes across as more deliberate and natural. They’re also not generally concerned about how much space they occupy. Not like, randomly sprawling, but just able to keep square shoulders and longer strides. Especially as a woman, you can tell how confident they are when they’re hitting on you, based on the space they’re comfortable taking up. More confident guys tend to start closer to you (for instance when they sit down next to you at a bar), and not be so electrically aware of touching. Unconfident guys tend to get a bit jumpy, and sometimes almost glaze over when space starts to be closed.


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The Daily Man-Up: Don’t Tell Anyone Your Goals

October 10, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @tinaflour)

I’ve noticed that whenever I talk to someone about my intentions, plans or goals it makes me less likely to follow through with them. This is because talking about positive intentions gives me a small endorphin rush similar to what you would feel if you actually completed the intention. This faux-pleasure from fantasising about the result/outcome of a goal isn’t a new concept, but I believe that by doing it in a social setting i’m also giving my ego a nice little boost from an external force.

So what I’ve been doing recently is forbidding myself to talk about the goal that I am currently working towards, and only allowing myself to talk about a goal once it is actually completed.

This seems pretty basic but it is really helping me to celebrate and reward actual success and to not celebrate and reward simply having the idea to succeed.

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The Daily Man-Up: Approach Anxiety is Illogical

October 9, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @almosbech)

Probably the biggest obstacle that keeps guys from learning how to approach a girl they like is approach anxiety.  But the amazing thing is that there is absolutely no logical reason for approach anxiety to even exist in the first place.  Here are 5 (though I could go on) of the top reasons why approach anxiety makes absolutely no sense whatsoever.

Women want to meet you

One of the things that stops a guy from learning how to approach a girl he likes is he will look at a girl and assume she doesn’t want to meet him.  He immediately thinks she’s “out of his league”, or that by approaching her he would just be a bother.

Both those thoughts are utter nonsense.  If you are a fun, positive, high-value guy (the kind of guy who would add value to her life) then most women will be more than happy to meet you.  It doesn’t matter what you look like or how much you have in your bank account.  If you can make a girl feel good (make her laugh, feel appreciated, connected, provide her with exciting new experiences, etc.) then she will be glad you walked into her life.  (And for all you guys worrying you’ll just wind up in the friend-zone, click here and learn how to ensure that won’t happen).


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The Daily Man-Up: To Have Freedom In Your Life, Stop Avoiding This One Thing

October 8, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @breakyourboundaries4)

Your brain wants your life to be predictable.

Your emotions want your life to be stable.

But stability and predictability are, interestingly, how you stay stuck and in survival-mode.

You can only have freedom in your life when you leave stability and predictability behind you.

You cannot be free unless you step into the unknown.

If you’re not willing to step into the unknown, then you’re a hostage to what you know. You’re a slave to your current circumstances.

You’re a slave to your emotions.

You’re a slave to your story.

You’re a slave to the fixed-mindset you have about what you think you are.


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The Daily Man-Up: Decide Exactly What You Want And Why

October 5, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: Jonas Verstuyft )

“The bigger the ‘why’ the easier the ‘how’.” — Jim Rohn

Your goal or desired outcome needs to be truly desirable. You need to really want it and have compelling reasons for wanting it.

Jim Rohn once said, “Reasons come first, answers come second.” You need reasons for doing something. Those reasons are your WHY.

The more reasons you can give yourself for accomplishing something, the more motivated you will be. These reasons, when powerful, become NEEDS. For example, look at your life right now.

Most people look at their current income as a product of their situation or capability. In reality, your current income is based on how much you believe you need.


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The Daily Man-Up

October 4, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

“It’s my ex-wife’s birthday today so I got up early and brought flowers and cards and a gift over for the kids to give her and helped them make her breakfast. Per usual someone asked me why the hell I still do things for her all the time. This annoys me. So ima break it down for you all.

I’m raising two little men. The example I set for how I treat their mom is going to significantly shape how they see and treat women and affect their perception of relationships. I think even more so in my case because we are divorced. So if you aren’t modeling good relationship behavior for your kids, get your shit together. Rise above it and be an example. This is bigger than you.

Raise good men. Raise strong women. Please. The world needs them, now more than ever.”


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The Daily Man-Up: 20 Lessons to Learn About Women And Dating

October 3, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Dating, Man-Up |

(photo: @manuelmeurisse)

Lesson 1: The #1 Myth About What Women Really Want Debunked

Men often think they can’t have the women they want because they don’t have enough money or good enough looks.

Let’s be real – money and good looks will get the woman’s attention, but that is all. It’s like a nice billboard advertisement it gets your attention but it doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll buy the product. The media has done a great job at making you believe in the erroneous assumption that money and six pack abs is the path to get your dream girl.

When you use money to take a woman out to nice dinners and to buy her gifts too early in the relationship, the woman will begin to think the man is trying to BUY her affection. Women see this as manipulation… and a LACK OF CONFIDENCE. Both of these are instant attraction killers. The woman may still answer your calls and let you take her out, but that is simply because she enjoys free stuff.

And who doesn’t?! Think about it.

You take this woman out and buy her stuff. You take her to a nice dinner. And then she heads home and meets the guy she really wants to be with. This guy does nothing for her except hang out, have fun with her and build tension yet he is the one taking her home while the other guy just dropped $150+ in one night on a date that lasted 1.5 hours.

After a certain point, money is meaningless. It ceases to be the goal. The game is what counts. – Aristotle Onassis


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The Daily Man-Up

October 2, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

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“I felt humiliated and suicidal in college. It seemed like my personal failings were on display for everyone to see. I’m not all that attractive. I have a speech impediment. I’m not good socially. I saw other guys having romantic success and I felt a lot of envy. I concluded that women owed me something. They owed me a chance. And I was angry they weren’t giving it to me. I’m ashamed of it now, but during that time I formed a lot of bad and hateful opinions. I joined ‘incel’ communities on 4chan and Reddit. I found a lot of men there who felt just like me. The community provided this pseudoscientific justification for hating women. It let us feel like it wasn’t our fault. We stoked each other’s anger. And it felt good. Honestly, anger is just very addictive. You want to feel angry when you’re suffering. It gives you adrenaline. It gets your endorphins going. It’s a release. It’s a substitute for what you’re missing.”

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