What's heroin like?
It's like having the worst girlfriend ever, who you are madly in love with but who treats you like shit, makes you sell your car and house and furniture and even your high school yearbook that your crush from 10th grade signed and told you that you were cute. She's told you to stop talking to anyone you've ever cared about, they don't want to talk to you while you're still dating her anyways. You sell your clothes so she can go out and buy new ones. You eat ramen every meal so she ca eat at the best restaurant in town. In the morning you think about her and in the evening you think about her and when you go to take a crap but you can't because you're constipated you're reminded of her. You wake up and if she's not in bed with you you get the chills, your eyes water, you have diarrhea, you sneeze, your muscles ache, you have anxiety, you have depression, you don't want to eat because food isn't appealing even though your stomach is rumbling, you don't particularly want to drink but you're dehydrated so you force yourself to drink some water, and during all this your skin is crawling as if it was dirty covered in goose-bumps from who knows where and you wish you were still asleep so you could at least pretend she was still in the bed with you. But you're awake now. So you get out of bed, and you go find her. Maybe today you won't have to do something that compromises your morals to find out where she's gone, but really you don't even care, as long as there is a way. You walk an hour and forty five minutes to get on the bus. You travel for another 45 minutes on public transportation. You get off at the train station in the bad part of town. All the while you have to shit so bad but you know once you find her that will be solved. You're hungry but dont want to eat, once you find her you can eat. You feel dirty and sad and anxious but once you find her she'll bathe you and make you happy and calm. But right now your walking through the ghetto. You walk another 20 minutes. Maybe it's cold and raining, if so you are so so so cold. Maybe it's hotter than hell and that just makes you feel dirtier. You find a guy that knows where she is. He says he'll go get her and bring her to you. And the cops pass you as you're talking to him and they have to know what's up. What's someone like you doing in this part of town? So the 10 minute wait for her to come back to you accompanied by the guy who could give two shits about you as long as you bring him money seems like an eternity. Maybe he'll run off with her and your money. Maybe she wont be looking so hot today, maybe she won't be herself. Maybe he'll come back with a woman you don't know and don't want to meet but now your money is gone and you're broke and sick and a good few hours away before you can get some more money and the world might as well be over in your opinion. But your girlfriend comes back, he brings her, and she gives you a kiss on the cheek. Then you go home, to your mattress and your overdue rent and the lack of food and the piled up bills and the same clothes you've been wearing for three days and your parents that have called but you never answer and your friends that invite you out but you never go, but you're home and she's there with you. Eventually you go to bed. But she's never there the next morning, and you know she won't be, and you wish someone invented a way to pause time, or go back in time, to that first time you met her, the first couple months when you guys hung out, before she made you sell everything to be with her, but you can't and you're fucked. And you know it.
A fitting welcome to the First Class Terminal
Top shelf selection on the house. There were more than 50 varieties of Scotch.
Didn’t snap any pics of the cigar lounge but I enjoyed a stogie with some good rum.
Awesome Redneck Glamour Shots – Bro My God
Aaaaaaaand It’s Time To Turn Off The TV And Pick Up A Book – Ned Hardy
This post looks familar – The Chive
The Hottest Swimsuit Model On The Planet – Knowd
9 Superhero Movies That Almost Happened – Crowd Ignite
With 6 M40 106mm rifles, meet the M50 Ontos “The Forgotten Tank-killer” (48 Photos) – The Brigade
Miley Cyrus Modeling A Swimsuit – Celeb Jihad
5 Famous Movie Characters Who Wasted Awesome Superpowers – Linkiest
Perfectly Shaped Bikini Babe – Double Viking
Courtney Stodden’s New Implants of the Day – Drunken Stepfather
Rihanna attacks fan with microphone – Celeb Slam
Kate Upton’s Boobs vs. Cameron Diaz…You Decide – G-Celeb
The FOX Sports North Girls Should Get More Attention – Big 10 Tens
Who’s Ready For Cute Beach Girls All Summer Long? (15 Pics) – Regretful Morning
The Heat Produces a Photoshop Abomination – Unreality Mag
12 Famous People Who Were Adopted – Uncoached
40 Pictures Of Weird People On Public Buses – Super Booyah
Anri Sugihara Puts her Apricots on Facebook #wednesdaywasabi – The Smoking Jacket
Damn, What The Hell Happened To Tori Spelling’s Face? – Moe Jackson
by Marcus Geduld
Just as with any skill, practice, practice, practice. Unfortunately, that means telling stories now, while you’re still bad at it. Getting good at anything means trying, failing, learning from failure, and trying again. Go ahead and fail, but keep a journal of your failures, analyzing as best you can why you failed and what you can do better next time. Earn your successes. Realize that you’ll never be good at storytelling. Not you in particular. Anybody! Updike, Fitzgerald, Shakespeare … — our greatest storytellers — all knew that the only worthwhile method was to keep trying and failing, trying and failing. Tips will help (see below), but please keep this paragraph always in the forefront of your mind.
What happens next?
The number-one ingredient for a story is the tension of an unsolved mystery. Stories set up a questions and delay answering them. The simplest example is a question in the first sentence with the answer delayed until the second sentence:
"You know who Bob’s favorite singer is? Meatloaf!"
That’s not a very interesting story, I know, but compare it to this:
"Bob’s favorite singer is Meatloaf."
The first version evokes (just a little) tension. The second doesn’t.
Now imagine telling the first version but walking out of the room after the first sentence:
"You know who Bob’s favorite singer is? —– "
That agony is what you should strive for. Because the most basic human urge that makes us want to listen to stories is the need to know what happens next.
Curiosity is the juggernaut that drives storytelling.
If you immediately tell us what happens next — or if there is no next ("Bob’s favorite singer is Meatloaf") — then there’s no hook.
Practice this simple question-delay-answer structure over and over, in all your communications. I mean in emails, text-messages, Quora posts, and so on. You’re not going to become a good storyteller by learning how to go into storytellingmode. Instead, turn yourself into someone who tells stories all the time. May stories a natural part of the way you communicate.
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