I’m still stuck in the 90’s. I don’t think I will ever get over it. The carefree days of playing video games, taking a break when the ice cream man rang his jingle and not having to worry about bills, insurance, rent, office politics, and the myriad of other bullshiet that seems to haunt being a grown up. The only comfort I take is to remember the good ol’ days and the good ol’ days consisted in a lot of video game playing, specifically NES. Here’s a selection of 10 awesome NES games, the boss fights and the ending to help you take a break from being a grown-up.
Mike Tyson’s Punch Out
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It was about forty yards to the gallows. I watched the bare brown back of the prisoner marching in front of me. He walked clumsily with his bound arms, but quite steadily, with that bobbing gait of the Indian who never straightens his knees. At each step his muscles slid neatly into place, the lock of hair on his scalp danced up and down, his feet printed themselves on the wet gravel. And once, in spite of the men who gripped him by each shoulder, he stepped slightly aside to avoid a puddle on the path.
It is curious, but till that moment I had never realized what it means to destroy a healthy, conscious man. When I saw the prisoner step aside to avoid the puddle, I saw the mystery, the unspeakable wrongness, of cutting a life short when it is in full tide. This man was not dying, he was alive just as we were alive. All the organs of his body were working - bowels digesting food, skin renewing itself, nails growing, tissues forming - all toiling away in solemn foolery. His nails would still be growing when he stood on the drop, when he was falling through the air with a tenth of a second to live. His eyes saw the yellow gravel and the grey walls, and his brain still remembered, foresaw, reasoned - reasoned even about puddles. He and we were a party of men walking together, seeing, hearing, feeling, understanding the same world; and in two minutes, with a sudden snap, one of us would be gone - one mind less, one world less.
Here’s a damn funny video of what it would look like if girls and guys swapped roles at a bar. I’m just going to leave it at that and not waste any more of your energy reading. Enjoy laughing at the damn video already.
When you accidentally “Like” a swimsuit photo of a girl whose facebook you are creeping on.
Here’s a pretty awesome video of some dude attempting to take The Gauntlet. The Gauntlet being the consumption of 6 habanero’s, the devouring of 15 warheads, the drinking and eating of diet coke and mento’s at the same time, the consumption of a spoonful of cinnamon and the drinking of a gallon of milk all in succession. Also there were two kick in the nuts after all was said and done to make sure that this man never reproduces, which in all honesty was a public service. God I love stupid people. If it weren’t for them, there would only be pron and cats on the internet.