Ask three questions before engaging in any conversation:
1) Do you both agree on the purpose of what you’re arguing about?
For example, if engaging in an argument about government policy, do you both agree on what the purpose of government is? If you don’t agree on the purpose, you’ll never sway each other as you’re arguing two different things.
2) Can I change this person’s opinion?
Is the person the type of person who makes decisions based on logic and reason, or are they ruled by emotion? If they’re ruled by emotion, no logic or reason, no matter how sound, will sway them. Try literally asking them “what could I provide that would sway your opinion?”
3) Will I benefit if this person’s opinion is changed?
Let’s say you succeed and change the opinion of a random dude on the internet… and? What did you gain?
4) Am I prepared to listen and have my opinion changed?
If any of these 4 questions can be answered with a “no”, do not engage in the discussion.
You will find this process will cause you to avoid most arguments.
You deserve this.
People posting delicious things on Imgur kicked my cravings into overdrive. So I made brownies with a fuk ton of chocolate chip
Think that was it? Nope. Added chocolate chip cookie dough. Brookies, fuk yeah.
Tips from an ex-salesman:
BEFORE YOU BUY
Browse without a salesman first. Get an idea for what you want. Do you want a small car, an SUV, a truck? Two rows, three rows? Automatic, manual? What special features do you want? Knowing what you want is the first step to finding the car you need. Go to a few dealerships at night or on Sundays. If you want to go during the day simply telling the salesman you don’t need help might not be enough to get rid of them, telling them you have a car in service for an oil change usually works.
Read Reviews. Once you have an idea what you like, looking online for reviews helps you to narrow down the field.
LOOK ONLINE! Almost all dealerships put very good prices on the internet. They know that if you are looking at their website you are probably also looking at the dealership down the road. They must be competitive online to get you in the door.
LOOK ONLINE!!! This will give you a good price point to start figuring out what you can afford. Don’t get sucked into a car you can’t afford by a good salesman. Find the car you want at the price you want and stick to it.
Take a good test drive. When you go on a test drive feel the car, listen to the car, pay attention to the car. That hum that the salesman says you won’t notice over the radio will be getting on your nerves 6 months from now. That rattle and bump, it’s going to be a problem. This is even more important on a used car. Use everything you see, hear, and feel later in your negotiations.
Try to find a car without add-ons. That Jeep with a lift kit, the sports car with an aftermarket spoiler, the truck with the big tires. The dealership adds this things on to add on to the price. This just makes it even harder to figure out exactly how much the car costs the dealer. These accessories are marked up excessively, so either look for a car without them or negotiate the accessories separately. (It will almost always cost you less to get the accessories put on afterward)
Don’t let them nickel and dime you. That $22,000 Truck you saw online, well now it has pinstripes ($300). VIN etched into the glbooty ($800). Fabric stain protectant ($500). Rust undercoating protectant ($900) and a spray in bed-liner ($1500). Now your 22,000 Truck is $26,000. Just like the accessories these are much less expensive done after you leave the dealership (even if you come back to have them done). Thanks /u/IvanTheTerrific
by Marcus Geduld
Just as with any skill, practice, practice, practice. Unfortunately, that means telling stories now, while you’re still bad at it. Getting good at anything means trying, failing, learning from failure, and trying again. Go ahead and fail, but keep a journal of your failures, analyzing as best you can why you failed and what you can do better next time. Earn your successes. Realize that you’ll never be good at storytelling. Not you in particular. Anybody! Updike, Fitzgerald, Shakespeare … — our greatest storytellers — all knew that the only worthwhile method was to keep trying and failing, trying and failing. Tips will help (see below), but please keep this paragraph always in the forefront of your mind.
What happens next?
The number-one ingredient for a story is the tension of an unsolved mystery. Stories set up a questions and delay answering them. The simplest example is a question in the first sentence with the answer delayed until the second sentence:
"You know who Bob’s favorite singer is? Meatloaf!"
That’s not a very interesting story, I know, but compare it to this:
"Bob’s favorite singer is Meatloaf."
The first version evokes (just a little) tension. The second doesn’t.
Now imagine telling the first version but walking out of the room after the first sentence:
"You know who Bob’s favorite singer is? —– "
That agony is what you should strive for. Because the most basic human urge that makes us want to listen to stories is the need to know what happens next.
Curiosity is the juggernaut that drives storytelling.
If you immediately tell us what happens next — or if there is no next ("Bob’s favorite singer is Meatloaf") — then there’s no hook.
Practice this simple question-delay-answer structure over and over, in all your communications. I mean in emails, text-messages, Quora posts, and so on. You’re not going to become a good storyteller by learning how to go into storytellingmode. Instead, turn yourself into someone who tells stories all the time. May stories a natural part of the way you communicate.
If you don’t have a good bakery in your area – i.e. bakes fresh every day, can tell you details about ingredients and procedures, acts like they give half a shiet – make your own. It’s pretty easy, and you can freeze leftover batches for later use. Just take a brioche recipe (my favorite bread), shape it into balls and proof as desired. I like mine *just* pillowy, with a bit of structure still but not too dense – the recipe I use is a high yeast dough (almost half percent total yield) and I proof my 84g buns for about an hour. I like a double egg wash and sesame, but do whatchya like ya biatch.
Listen, you can make your dry-aged short rib or wagyu burgers, but it probably will have a hard time competing with Five Guys (seriously, fuk those guys, I’ve lost sleep thinking about how good their bacon burger is). The number one cause of shietty-booty shietburgers? You bought grocery store ground beef; you will get nowhere with that. Grind the best quality chuck roast you can find, and you’re set. Actually, you don’t even need a grinder (even though they’re cheap); you can chop/mince cold beef and get arguably better texture. It just takes longer. I like a mix of about 60 percent chuck and 40 percent brisket. I have a guy who only works with prime, so thats what I’m using. Just leave my expensive sirloin alone. Ya biatch.
It’s about learning to read cues. Most girls (or people in general) don’t like to straight-up tell you “Go away,” but they’ll send a number of signals to indicate that they’re uncomfortable or don’t want to talk to you.
- not responding to messages
- responding with one word
- answering questions but not asking you any (they’re trying to be polite, but not trying to keep the conversation going)
- never initiating contact with you
- keeping conversation at a superficial level, changing the subject when you try to go deeper
- trying to escape the conversation (looking around frequently, looking at phone, talking to other people)
As for things you can do when talking to people:
- A comment on a girl’s physical appearance, especially if you don’t know her, and particularly through the internet, is not the best way to start a conversation. What do you say to “You have a gorgeous smile”? “Um, thanks.” The end. It can go no further.
Try bringing up a mutual interest, mutual experience, etc. and work from there. Show interest in her as a human first, and then bring up her gorgeous smile- not only does it spark more conversational possibilities, it separates you from the creeps who are only interested in banging a hottie and don’t care about the person that hottie might be.
With few exceptions, any line used to seduce women in porrn will NOT work in real life.
Another killer is a simple, “Hey,” followed by silence. If you want to start the conversation, YOU come up with something to talk about. This goes with just about anyone. We all have that friend who gets bored, pops on chat and says “hey,” hoping we have some way to entertain them.
Avoid overt sexual comments to anyone you don’t know well, and most girls you do know well. Rule of thumb: Unless she has touched you of her own volition (this includes reciprocating physical contact you have initiated), you probably shouldn’t be bringing up any sort of sex talk.
In general, avoid opening up too much personal information or asking too much personal information with people you don’t know well. Hate to say it, but people just don’t want to hear it most of the time, and it makes them uncomfortable.
Know who is and is not your close friend. Someone you’ve met once? Not a close friend. Someone you’ve chatted with occasionally on Facebook? Not a close friend. These people can become close friends, but be on the lookout for signals of interest before getting too excited.
On a related note, don’t bootyume that one really good conversation has solidified your connection. It’s easy to get overeager and pull a Tommy Boy . Relationships take time to develop closeness, so even if you feel a connection right away, resist the urge to jump to BFF too soon. (Unless it’s CLEARLY mutual, then congratulations! You got lucky.)
Respect boundaries. If someone seems uninterested in talking to you, DO NOT PUSH IT.
If someone doesn’t want to talk to you, let it go. Don’t try to make yourself feel better by insulting them, or try to make them feel guilty by sending them a long-winded sob story. There are 7 billion people on this planet, and odds are a few of them will like you, so don’t worry too much about the others.
Finally, creepiness is subjective and it’s a term people throw about carelessly these days. There are people who will call you a creep for arbitrary reasons, including some girls who will throw that label onto any guy they don’t want to talk to. Try to keep a realistic view of yourself, get feedback from people you can trust to be honest about your behavior, and don’t give up. Social ineptitude isn’t congenital; you can do it.