When I was a kid trying to sneak into the adult section of the local video rental store
When I see a whole family at Walmart during this pandemic
When they tell me The Rock was on Star Trek
When I think I have a small dick but then I see what small dick ACTUALLY looks like
The family’s reaction when Mom thought ‘Sausage Party’ would be a great kids movie to play
When my conscious tells me I can’t start drinking at noon during self isolation
When someone says “wait until end!” on a 6 min video
Vegans when they haven’t been able to tell strangers that they are vegans for the last month
When your mom catches you sleeping in church, but she’s not close enough to pinch you
"It’s okay, he doesn’t bite"
Her: "Daddy, pass the salt please"
Me and her dad: