1. My mom is a Karen whose name is actually Karen. Simply put, I haven’t seen her in over a year because I couldn’t take it anymore. Living with her was just an exhausting nightmare.
Karen’s world revolves around Karen. Nobody else’s issues matter. If you tell her that you had a bad day, she’ll give you 20 reasons why her day was worse. You worked 60 hours this week? Well, when she was your age, she would work 80. You’re in the hospital after having major surgery? She has a pinched nerve in her arm, which is somehow worse. Your boyfriend cheated on you? She couldn’t even begin to tell you about all the heartbreak she’s experienced in her life.
She complains left and right about anything and everything. If you’re taking a week break after just getting back from college, she’ll ask why you haven’t gotten a job yet and claim you’re lazy. If you’re out to eat at a restaurant the food is always too cold or too burnt or too salty. You can only ever go to the places SHE wants to go to, because everything else is crap. My entire graduation dinner she complained about how cold the food was.
She THRIVES in getting attention and constantly seeks it, but she has very few ACTUAL friends. Facebook is her lifeblood and she’s always looking to start something on there. She’s the queen of sharing uninformed, misguided, conservative propaganda, which always starts fights in her comments. Also, if a tragedy happens in the family (like the passing of my teenage cousin), she’ll make a big scene on Facebook and expect condolences from anyone and everyone, and makes note of the people who don’t give her what she wants.
Don’t even get me started on the blatant racism. I’ve heard everything from, “watch out for black people on the subway. They’ll try to take your purse” to “It should be illegal for those Muslims to cover their faces. You should be able to see someone’s face.” One of my best friends is black and she once told me, “He’s one of the good ones. They should all be like him.”
2. Was married to a male Karen. Everything, and I mean everything, could set him off.
We were at a local taproom and his iPhone automatically connected to the Wifi. Keep in mind, he had full bars on our cell service. The WiFi was being wonky and wasn’t working. The manager, super nice guy, comes over and asks how we are doing, while he washes some glasses in the dish pit on the other side of the bar. The following conversation ensues, keep in mind, my husband is super irritated at this made up problem because our cell service is working just fine and he can literally just turn off the WiFi:
Husband: Your WiFi is fucking trash.
Manager: I’m sorry. We recently upgraded our internet, and Cox is sending us a new modem. It’s supposed to be here this week.
Husband: If you say you have WiFi, you should make sure it actually works.
Manager: I know. I’m sorry. I’d be happy to restart the modem to see if that helps.
Husband then ignores him and continues to talk under his breath about a made up issue.
This was my life for almost five years. The sense of entitlement was frustrating enough in public, but more so at home. I had apologized to more servers, retail workers, neighbors, and random people in public for him in five years than the rest of my life outside of him.
You know what, now that I’m talking about it, maybe he’s not so much a male Karen. He’s more like a piece of shit.
3. My sister is a Karen. Everyone feels so sorry for her husband. Everything is his fault. He is treated like a slave. She only addresses him by yelling. She constantly insults him. We have no idea why he hasn’t divorced her or flipped out and attacked her. We have all told her to cool it and her response is that he’s just so stupid. I could go on and on but my sister really is a horrible person.
4. My sister AND sister in law are both Karen’s. I will show up to restaurants 15 min early to warn them. I tell them if it’s not done to their liking they WILL hear about it and they will make your shift hell. I’m just there as a warning.
I used to work in restaurants and those people made life hell. I do what I can to help. Generally my drinks are better and we get a free appetizer as soon as those two tornados walk in all hell breaks loose. Not enough ice, table is too cold, it’s too loud, etc. I also tip really big because I DON’T want to be associated with the two tornados.
I live overseas so I only see them 2 weeks out of the year. So it’s manageable. I only put up with their attitude because they could take my nieces and nephews away from me. I pick my battles. I need my nieces and nephews to know I’m always here for them and they can talk to me about anything. I can’t risk our relationship being tampered with, especially since I only see them 2 weeks a year.
5. Not married to a Karen, but married someone with a Karen for a sister. Sister in law is the freaking worst. I hate more than anything going out to dinner with her, listening to her order food and talk to the servers. Holidays are also terrible, she sends out long lists of expected gifts list. She celebrates every holiday and birthday specifically for presents even when it not appropriate.
Funny thing is one time I was away from the dinner table when the bill came and SIL waited for me to return to pay the bill by actually handing it to me. She didn’t give it to her sibling/my SO or pay her half, but expressly handed it to me to pay.
6. My moms a Karen. Literally overreacts to everything. Whenever something doesn’t go her way- you guessed: gotta speak to the manager or whoever is in charge. Sometimes really embarrassing to go out in public with her because she’ll just yell at the service workers for the smallest of things. Also she has a bob cut.
7. 4 years of a toxic relationship though. I broke up with her on Monday, again. We’re kinda fucked financially because of this lockdown so we are just feeling things out for a month before we decide forsure. This cycle is on repeat.
I constantly have to cut her off and speak over her because of the way she treats people. Waiters, sales assistants, gym staff, neighbours , landlords, randoms we meet in bars etc.
Note: we were both waiters at the beginning of our relationship so she has worked in the industry, but still lacks empathy. She blames the waiter if something is out of stock etc.
My second major issue. We are both English second language teachers. She teaches kindergarten, while I teach highschool. Now that we are working from home I hear how she speaks to her students and it’s really opened up another aspect of her personality that I don’t like. She will berate a student for not understanding instead of evaluating her ability to explain. Shitting on 3 year olds in their second language doesn’t fly with me.
A lot of her behaviour stems from a self defence mechanism due to insecurity, but that’s not an excuse. She doesn’t realise how mean she is to people, including myself.
I’m a people pleaser that would rather sacrifice my own comfort than someone else’s. She expects me to be an asshole to people because I’m a biggish guy with tattoos, I don’t exactly look soft. It’s toxic as hell, please help.
8. Not married to one but my mom is absolutely one. I spend most of my time with her in public apologizing to people after she’s walked away. The one and only time it comes in handy is when I’ve bought cars and had her come in during the price negotiation phase – she’s knocked off thousands purely due to how unpleasant she is and how much people want her to just get the hell out of the door.
9. My ex wife is a Karen, in every sense but name. It was always so embarrassing. She was incapable of treating anyone like a human for the most trivial of occurrences. It was hell for me, as a person that’s pretty forgiving and don’t seek out confrontation. So in a 1 word description it was Hell. Lol
10. Engaged to one, she was raised as a princess by here military raised father. However she’s super down to earth but god forbid you work in the service industry and mess something up. She worked at IHOP during college so it humbled her compared to her family. She just writes reviews now (good or bad) and emails corporate to complain. If something is wrong with my food she refuses me to sit there and eat it. Which I hate but I have gotten her better about it (I believe). So maybe she is just a recovering Karen at this point.
11. I’m not married to a Karen but someone in my family decided to make a Karen family and let me just say.. it is freaking hell! I do not go to any social event if said Karen will be there (keeps the peace in my family tbh) nor do I go alone with Karen. She is a nightmare to everyone in her path, from car guards to cashiers, even her friends… No one can be better than her or smarter than her and she’s just freaking exhausting man. The worst part is… Her kids are becoming just like her
12. My mum is a bit of a Karen, and we’re pretty much no contact now so that should tell you everything you need to know. Whenever we’d go out to eat it’s always too cold, they don’t have the brand of sparkling water she likes, they’ve put ice in her drink when she didn’t want it, she always has to make some kind of modification to her order etc. the list goes on.
It got to the point where if we were out shopping and she said she needed to return something I’d just go somewhere else because I couldn’t stand watching her be rude and argue with the staff.
My parents are divorced and I live with my dad now instead. Part of the reason I barely see my mum is because I’d have to meet her in public (go for a coffee or something) and I just can’t deal with the way she behaves in these places so I don’t go.