She owes me $1000 dollars. She’s like basically my best friend since elementary school though I don’t see her too much anymore.
I haven’t asked her to hang out in a few months but she hasn’t asked me either. Both late 20s.
She asked me to borrow money for gas like a month ago ($30) and never paid me back either.
Im moving out soon so that extra $1,000 would really help me out though most likely she won’t pay it. Should I ask for it back? I’m trying not to be a push over anymore.
Dear Friend in Need,
Let’s get real here: It’s not weird to ask for your money back, but I’ve got to be straight with you – you’re probably not going to see that grand again. And that $30 for gas? Consider it gone with the wind.
Here’s a hard truth many of us learn the painful way: lending money to friends or family is about as wise as using a chocolate teapot. It’s messy, it rarely ends well, and someone always gets burned. The old saying “Neither a borrower nor a lender be” isn’t just Shakespeare being a killjoy – it’s solid life advice.
If you absolutely must lend money to a friend or relative, here’s the golden rule: only lend what you’re comfortable never seeing again. Treat it like you’re buying a lottery ticket, but instead of dreaming about yachts and private islands, you’re hoping for the return of your own cash. It’s a gamble, and the house usually wins.
Now, about your situation. Sure, you could reach out and say something like, “Hey, remember that grand I lent you? I’m moving out and could really use it back.” But brace yourself for disappointment. Your friend’s already shown her true colors by not repaying the gas money. A grand? That’s probably as gone as your childhood dreams of being a unicorn trainer.
You’re trying not to be a pushover, and that’s commendable. But sometimes the best way to avoid being a doormat is to recognize when you’ve already been stepped on and learn from it. This $1,000 might just be the tuition you’re paying in the School of Life.
If by some miracle she does repay you, great! But don’t hold your breath. Instead, focus on moving forward – literally, in your case. As you pack up your stuff, pack away this lesson too: your financial wellbeing is your responsibility, and true friends won’t put that at risk.
In the future, if a friend asks for money, remember this moment. If you can’t afford to give it as a gift, don’t lend it. Your wallet – and your friendships – will thank you.
Good luck with the move. And hey, even if you’re out a grand, you’re richer in wisdom. That’s something, right?