I have no idea how can someone switch up overnight, after all the time you spent together during dates for 2 months, texting daily, planning future dates and everything, just for them to turn cold and distant next morning without further notice.
This girl i thought was the one looking at how we clicked and vibed together, she would share with me everything, talk to me on the phone, show me interest, until one day she decides otherwise and start leaving me on read for days, without ANY reason.
I tried reaching out 3 times, but each time she would answer dry and leave me on read, i didn’t even get a closure or goodbye message.
How can someone be so cruel? I am 27 and i never had this happen to me, i consider myself as an attractive guy, fit, always had success in dating but this time my confidence got crushed, and i feel so stupid getting played like this, wasting all this time, efforts and money for nothing.
First off, let me say this: your feelings are valid. Being ghosted sucks. It’s confusing, it’s hurtful, and it leaves you spinning with questions that probably don’t have satisfying answers. You put yourself out there, gave your time and energy, and had what felt like a meaningful connection—only to have it vanish like a puff of smoke. That hurts, man, and I’m sorry you’re going through it.
Now, let’s unpack this a little.
Ghosting, as brutal as it feels, isn’t always about you. Often, it says more about the other person’s inability to handle uncomfortable emotions or communicate honestly. Maybe she felt overwhelmed. Maybe she realized she wasn’t ready for something serious. Maybe she was dealing with her own baggage. Who knows? The truth is, you might never know. And while that lack of closure is infuriating, it’s also a gift in disguise—it’s a signal to stop investing energy in someone who wasn’t willing or able to meet you where you are.
You’re sitting here wondering how someone could be so cruel. Let me gently push back on that. Ghosting isn’t kind, but it’s not always cruelty. Sometimes, it’s cowardice. Sometimes, it’s a reflection of someone’s emotional immaturity. It’s not about you being unworthy or “played.” It’s about someone else not having the tools—or the guts—to show up for the kind of relationship you were ready for.
Let’s talk about the other part of this: your confidence. You feel crushed, and I get that. But let’s zoom out. One person’s actions—however confusing or hurtful—don’t define your worth. They don’t erase the great connections you’ve had before or mean you’ll never find someone who clicks with you in the future. This isn’t the end of your story; it’s just a tough chapter.
So what do you do now? You grieve it. You feel the hurt, you write it out, you talk to someone you trust. And then, you start focusing on yourself again. Confidence isn’t about being invincible; it’s about bouncing back. It’s about saying, “This sucked, but it doesn’t get to own me.”
Let this be a lesson, not a verdict. You’re 27. You’ve got time, you’ve got options, and you’ve got value. The right person—the one who’s ready to match your energy, effort, and respect—won’t leave you wondering where you stand. And when that person shows up, all of this? It’ll make sense. You’ll see that being ghosted by someone who wasn’t ready for you was just life clearing the path for someone who is. Hang in there. You’re stronger than you feel right now.