So my ex said that because of her mental health issues, she wanted to take a break from our relationship because she didn’t want to drag me down while she was dealing with it, anyway 2 days later she’s going on a date with a guy from work
Man, I’m really sorry you’re going through this. I know it hurts. Breakups are brutal. Especially when they come wrapped in confusion, mixed messages, and—let’s call it what it is—betrayal.
Here’s the thing: When someone tells you they need space to work on their mental health, that should be met with empathy and grace. We all struggle sometimes. Life is hard. And it takes maturity to say, “Hey, I’m not in a good place right now, and I don’t want to hurt you in the process.”
But when someone says that and then hops on a date with a coworker two days later?
Brother… that’s not about mental health. That’s not about protecting you. That’s not about needing space. That’s about keeping one foot in your world while trying on someone else’s.
It’s about cowardice. About using “mental health” as a shield to avoid accountability. And I don’t say that lightly—because mental health is serious. But it’s not a license to treat people like crap.
You feel disrespected because you were disrespected. You feel confused because she gave you mixed signals on purpose. She didn’t want to be the “bad guy,” so she cloaked her exit in concern and compassion—but her actions told the real story. People vote with their feet, not their words.
So here’s what you do now:
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Stop trying to make sense of it. There’s no deeper logic hiding under the surface. You don’t need to excavate her motives or analyze every text. You got your answer when she made that date.
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Hold your boundaries. Don’t let her back in just because she gets lonely or changes her mind. You deserve someone who is all in—not someone who disappears under the guise of “healing” and reappears when they’re bored or disappointed by someone new.
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Focus on your healing. Not hers. Yours. This is the time to feel what you need to feel. Anger, betrayal, grief—don’t run from it. Sit in it. Feel it fully. And then start walking forward.
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Remember who you are. You are not disposable. You’re not a fallback plan. You’re not someone who deserves half-hearted love or convenient affection. You are worth honesty, consistency, and someone who chooses you—every day.
Mental health issues are real. But so is basic decency. And what she did? That was neither brave nor kind. That was a cop-out.
So let her go. Mourn what could’ve been. But don’t look back. The future is forward.
You’ve got this.