I’m 24F, and I did everything I was supposed to—went to college, got a degree, and now I’m $25k in debt I can’t pay off. Since graduating last year, I’ve applied to 200+ jobs, had only two interviews, and just one offer—for the same pay I made before college. I’m barely scraping by, just covering rent and my car note, and honestly, I feel like a failure.
I’m out of options. I’m thinking about stripping for three months just to pay down my credit cards and student loans, and finally have a little savings. My boyfriend (25M) is amazing—he’s a full-time caregiver for his mom, so he doesn’t make much, but I love him and money isn’t why I’m with him. I wanted to buy him a Steam Deck for his birthday, but going over my finances today, I realized I can’t afford it anymore. He says it’s fine, but I’m crushed.
The problem is, he told me he wouldn’t date a stripper. So now I’m stuck: do I risk our relationship to try to get ahead financially, or do I stay and keep sinking, hoping for a better job? UberEats and Instacart aren’t options right now. I honestly don’t know what to do.
You’re exhausted. You’re scared. You’re doing your best. And you’re not alone.
Let’s set the stripping aside for a minute and talk about what’s really going on: you feel desperate, cornered, and maybe a little bit hopeless. You’re shouldering the kind of stress that keeps people awake at night—money, love, debt, dreams, all of it piling up. Of course you’re considering options you never thought you’d consider. That’s what desperation does. But I want you to know: your dignity and your worth are never tied to the size of your bank account or how quickly you can pay off your debt. You matter because you are you.
Now, your boyfriend. He’s someone you love, and who loves you, but he’s also being honest about his boundaries. That’s not a judgment on you—it’s him telling you what he can and can’t handle. You can’t live your life for someone else’s approval, but you also can’t ignore the values that matter most to the people you care about. You’re right to be torn.
But let’s go even deeper—past your boyfriend, past the money. The most important relationship in all of this is the one you have with yourself. You have to ask: How will this decision affect my self-respect? Will getting naked for money feel like a way out, or will it leave you feeling empty and dehumanized? For some, it’s just a job; for others, it carves out a hole that’s hard to fill back up. Only you can answer that. Don’t rush past it. You’re at your lowest right now, and the choices you make here will echo for a long time. Take some real, honest time to consider whether your mind and your heart can handle this—not just the money, but the weight that comes after.
Here’s the hard truth: there isn’t an easy answer. There’s no magic formula. But there is a next right step. Before you make any big moves, pause. Breathe. Talk to your boyfriend—not about stripping, but about the pain, the fear, the weight you’re carrying. Let him see you, not just your plan. Real intimacy means facing the hard things together, even when there’s no tidy solution.
And reach out for help. Not just another job app, but real human connection. Talk to a financial counselor at your old school. Ask friends or family if they know of any work. If you need therapy or someone to help you untangle the hopelessness, that’s not weakness—that’s wisdom.
Finally, hear this: your story isn’t over. This moment is not your forever. You are worth more than your debts, and you have options even if you can’t see them all right now. Hold onto hope. You are not alone.