I was with my ex for 7 years she’s 36 and I miss her all the time, I look at other women and they all seem like downgrades in comparison to my ex. She was perfect, great ass, great boobs slim waist, nice face. Everything about her physically was great, the internal not so much since she cheated on me and was manipulative and abusive at times.
But part of me still wants her and I am extremely jealous of the guy she cheated on me with as he is now with her in a relationship.
Whilst I can’t find anyone or am attracted to anyone. It’s been 8 months and I just feel stuck fantasising about her and what she’s doing and how I am never going to be with a woman as hot as her ever again in my life.
You are spending your days mourning a woman who cheated on you, manipulated you, and abused you because you were attracted to her.
That is the reality.
You have taken someone who betrayed you and turned her into a fantasy because you are fixated on her appearance. Her looks do not erase what she did.
She was not perfect. She was attractive. Those are not the same thing.
The guy she is with now did not win some grand prize. He is with someone who has already shown she can cheat on a long term partner.
You are jealous of a man sitting in a chair you already know is broken.
The bigger problem is that you are still feeding the obsession. Every time you fantasize about her, check up on her, compare other women to her, or imagine what she is doing, you keep the wound open.
You do not have an ex problem anymore. You have a discipline problem.
Your mind goes to her, and instead of shutting the fantasy down, you entertain it. You replay the best parts and ignore the betrayal. Then you wonder why you are still stuck.
The question is not whether you will ever find someone as attractive as her.
The question is why you are willing to trade your self respect for the memory of someone who treated you badly.
A person with self respect does not beg life to return someone who betrayed them.
They grieve. They get angry. They accept reality. Then they move forward.
She was not the love of your life. The love of your life does not cheat on you, manipulate you, or abuse you.
She was a chapter. A painful one. But you are acting like the book ended when she left.
It did not.