How did you two meet? Do you have any interesting hobbies or things you do together?
We met in college and we were friends for a while before we started dating. Nothing too interesting, usually we just watch movies or play video games together.
How do it get to that point?
She’s always been huge and just gradually kept putting on weight over the years from a combination of genetics, a really low metabolism, laziness, overeating, etc. She’s not doing anything to lose weight right now.
What is a typical day’s diet for you both like?
I eat 2 or 3 meals a day, occasional snacks, a pretty normal diet. I try to eat healthy overall though. She does snack pretty constantly throughout the day and she gets much larger portions than I do when we order takeout or we’re at a restaurant or something.
What’s the go-to comfort food?
For me, probably pizza. For her, anything chocolatey. Especially cake.
Does she cook and do normal every day chores (Laundry ect)
She can cook and she does it when she’s in the mood. She helps with folding laundry and light chores like that.
How does she clean herself?
I usually help her, but she’s more capable than people tend to assume. We have a big shower with a seat in it and I help clean the areas that she can’t reach by herself. But she’d be able to use a brush if I wasn’t there.
Do you guys do any outdoor activities?
I go for runs and stuff, but she doesn’t do any outside activities.
Are you a feeder?
I wouldn’t identify as one. I probably have some mild feeder tendencies, but I’ve been with thin women before as well and our relationship isn’t based on her weight at all.
I enjoy seeing her happy, and eating makes her happy, so I enjoy seeing her eat, despite conflicted feelings about what it’s doing to her health.
Do you have a BBW fetish?
I wouldn’t say I have a specific fetish for bbw, I’ve been with women of all sizes, but I am attracted to many larger women that the majority of guys wouldn’t still find attractive because of their size, so I guess it could be labelled as a fetish.
How is sex? What positions are comfortable?
Sex is great. But we can’t really do many positions safely besides a variation of missionary. She’s not able to be nearly as mobile during sex as a smaller girl, so I have to do most of the work. She can’t go for nearly as long either without taking breaks. She still has a decent libido though.
I’ve grown to enjoy her softness and size when we’re intimate, she’s amazing for cuddling.
Do you have to lift skin / fat away to have sex?
I have to lift her stomach up to have sex, yes.
I guess there are lots of layers that can be used for stimulation (Simular to boobs), have you done it?
I don’t really get what you’re asking, but yeah, there’s many parts of her body that can be stimulated.
When you are on top is it harder for her to breathe?
When I’m on top of her? Not really, she doesn’t have any more difficulty with breathing. She just gets out of breath from having sex.
Is it possible to do it if she is on top?
It’s possible and we’ve done it before, but it’s not really safe. She gets nervous too.
Do you engage in oral sex?
Both of us give and receive oral sex.
Does hygiene affect your intimacy? Is there a precoital routine performed?
Her hygiene isn’t always great, but it’s something that I’ve just gotten used to and I try to help how I can. It doesn’t really turn me off or anything anymore. We don’t have a precoital hygiene routine.
Why isn’t she trying to lose weight? Are you encouraging her to lose weight?
She’s tried several times in the past and hasn’t been successful. She’s had terrible and traumatic experiences with people who tried to make her lose weight or made her feel awful about her current size, even when she was actually trying.
She’s just at the point now where she’s in a loving and fulfilling relationship and losing weight isn’t the number one thing on her mind. I’ve encouraged her to make healthier choices. I can’t force her.
Has your GF tried therapy to deal with her unhealthy eating habits?
She’s been to therapy several times in her life.
Does your girlfriend feel selfish or ashamed that she’s so overweight that she cannot work?
She’s had several jobs before, in person and remotely. She’s just not working currently and she doesn’t feel shame over that. She’s not too overweight to work, she could still work from home if she wanted to. She has a degree.
How do you not start to resent her when she’s doing nothing to help herself? Like you have to go to work, while she stays home and just eats, plays video games etc.
I don’t resent her, I’ve just accepted her faults and I’m happy to take care of someone I love. And I’m happy that I make enough so the woman I love doesn’t have to work anymore. I’d rather not be working either.
Do you not think that’s irresponsible and likely dangerous?
Sure I do. Does that mean I’m not allowed, or shouldn’t be dating her? Plenty of people smoke, drink, engage in loads of irresponsible or dangerous behaviors. Obesity is such a stigmatized thing that people act like you’re morally corrupt for even knowing someone obese who isn’t actively trying to lose weight.
How does your GF feel about herself? Is she confident? Does she have self-respect? Does she feel selfish for dragging you down with her?
She’s usually pretty confident and outgoing. I’d say she has self-respect, but I know plenty of the people here would just tell me that’s impossible if she let herself get to this size.
How do your parents/family feel about you dating someone so large?
My parents were surprised by her size when they first met her, but they’ve gotten to know her a lot better and they really love her now.
If you gave her an ultimatum that you’d leave if she didn’t take better care of herself, would she change her eating habits?
She probably would try, but she’d be hurt and our whole relationship would change and probably fall apart eventually from that.
Do you have any nagging doubts about this relationship?
I don’t have any doubts about being in a loving and intimate relationship with her. She’s not in denial about her weight and I love her for who she is.
Relationships don’t have to be about what someone “brings to the table” or upgrading until you find someone who’s in a better physical and mental condition than your last partner. Sometimes you just love someone and you want to spend your time with them.
What do you like the most about her? How did you know she was the one you wanted to commit your life to?
Everything really. Her personality, her hair, her smile, her sense of humor. We communicate and get along better than anyone else I know. We spend almost all day, every day together and I could never get tired of her company. There wasn’t really a single point where I knew that, we just reached that stage in our relationship eventually.
Whats your proudest achievement ( both as a couple and individually)?
I’m proud of my career, we’re both proud of our education and how much we’ve learned and matured together as a couple.
Do you have long term hopes/dreams as a couple? I.e. would you like to get married, have children etc? Would this even be a possibility given her weight?
Marriage isn’t something we really think about, it’s just a tradition for most people. We’re in a happy and committed relationship. Neither of us want children.