I’m in my mid-30s, have been single for 11 years.
A colleague recently asked me why I’m single. I’ve got a good job, I’m funny, in shape etc, so why am I not with anyone?
I told her that I don’t think relationships are worth the effort, and I have no desire to be with anyone. I got the usual awkward look, and that was the end of that.
A friend of mine recently split up with his partner and within 2 weeks he was back on the apps and looking for someone else. This just baffles me, and I cannot understand why he doesn’t enjoy single life.
Both of these scenarios got me thinking about how I don’t even entertain the idea of a relationship. It’s just one of those things that other people do.
I’ll go to work, go to the gym in some evenings and just entertain myself. I’m now looking buy my own place, do some career development, and try and make some more friends.
At no point do I think, ‘yeah it would nice to find someone’.
The only time it ever comes to mind is when I think about travel. I’d love to travel more, but as I’ve got no one to go with, that is the only time I ever contemplate it.
I find women attractive, there’s no doubt about that. However, there is no desire to be with someone. It almost feels like that aspect of human instinct is missing.
And before anyone asks, I do watch porn, but it’s usually once a week. Even that, has also dropped off quite a lot lately.
Anyone else feel this way?
Do you identify more with the idea of happily staying single, focusing on self and career without the desire for a romantic relationship, or do you actively seek companionship and view relationships as an important part of life?