Look, I get it. As guys, we can be dense as hell when it comes to picking up on flirting signals from women. Maybe it’s because we’re so used to being the pursuers, or maybe it’s because our minds are clouded with constant thoughts of sex, but for whatever reason, a girl can be throwing herself at us and we’ll be like “Huh, I think she’s just being friendly.” Well, it’s time to pull our heads out of our asses and wise up.
First of all, context is key. If a girl is being super friendly and flirty with you at a bar or party, chances are it’s not because she wants to discuss the weather or hear about your stamp collection. She’s likely interested in you, genius. On the other hand, if it’s a platonic friend or coworker, you need to be a bit more cautious about reading into things. Don’t be the creep who mistakes basic human kindness for wanting to jump your bones.
If a girl is going out of her way to be physically close to you, she’s probably not just being friendly. I’m talking about “accidentally” brushing up against you, finding excuses to touch you, or straight up sitting on your lap. These are all green lights, my friend. Don’t just sit there like a deer in headlights – reciprocate the contact and see where it leads.
Consider how she’s acting compared to other people around. Is she singling you out, asking you a lot of questions, seeming really interested in everything you have to say? Or is she working the room and being equally friendly with everyone? If you’re getting special attention, there’s likely a reason.
Another big one is when a girl creates scenarios to be alone with you. Maybe she suggests watching a movie at her place, or mentions that her roommates are out of town for the weekend. This is not a platonic invitation to hang out and play Scrabble. She wants you, dumbass. Agree to the plans and escalate accordingly.
Also, pay attention to what she’s saying, especially if there’s flirty subtext. If she compliments your physique, jokes about sharing a bed, or talks about how she’s newly single and ready to mingle – take the goddamn hint. These are all openings for you to steer the conversation in a more suggestive direction.
Now, I get it – sometimes it’s hard to tell if a girl is into you or just being nice. But here’s the thing – if you’re picking up a vibe, it’s always better to cautiously test the waters than to play it safe and risk missing your shot. Start with some light flirting and see how she responds. If she laughs, flirts back, and keeps the banter going, that’s a good sign. If she seems disinterested or uncomfortable, then just dial it back and no harm done.
The bottom line is, don’t be the guy who looks back on his life and realizes he missed out on countless opportunities because he was too far up his own ass to notice when a girl was throwing herself at him. Pay attention to the signs, take some chances, and for fuck’s sake – if a girl invites you into her bed, you say YES.