Life Experiences

Confessions Of A Dude Who Spent 11 Years In Prison

October 19, 2017 3 Comments

What happened?

Basically I was obsessed with a girl from school. Like psycho obsessed, and when I finally developed the courage to ask her out, she said no. I fucking snapped and went to her house in a kinda hostage situation and stabbed her. Horrible shit man. I have horrible remorse for it. She is “ok” in that she is alive and well, but what I did to her will last forever

What’s your background story? Drugs, broken home, mental disorders? What made you become that kid that would shoot up your school if given the chance? Were you the weird kid or was this kinda out of no where type of shocking news to everyone around you type of thing?

To be kinda quick about it, my dad was very abusive. He would beat the fuck out of my mother and us. I was severely overweight my entire life, had no friends at all. I stayed in my room and played video games nearly every day. Therapy wasn’t an option, because men don’t go to therapy. I had this intense rage built up for so long that it kinda exploded. Btw, I’m not blaming them, because plenty of people have grown up with those same problems. I made a choice and I had to own that

What Is It Like When One Of Your Parents Gets Alzheimer’s?

October 17, 2017 1 Comment

I knew right away that something was different. My 74 year old mother and I had been very close all my life. (She lived with my family.) When her personality started to change I couldn’t understand why. She loved crafts, gardening, singing, piano, anything creative, but all of a sudden she wasn’t interested in her hobbies. She just wanted to sit in her chair and watch TV. We started to argue. It reminded me of when I was a teenager 25 years earlier, how we would squabble over stupid things. Then she would get angry at the littlest thing and slam her bedroom door in my face.

Nothing made sense, why was she changing? Was she mad at me? Was she depressed? Should I take her to a doctor?

One day she would be grumpy and then the next she would seem fine and we would go shopping for new flower bushes, have a great lunch out and come home laughing. Cook a ham, play some scrabble, help the kids with homework, she was an integral part of the family. I kept thinking… oh good, it’s all over now.
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What’s It Like To Be A Member Of A Triad?

September 26, 2017 3 Comments

My involvement began in high school. There was nothing dramatic about it, I just became friends with a bunch of people I thought were cool and one thing led to another.

High school gangs are like triad training schools. They are not part of the triads per se, they’re more of a triad Mickey Mouse fan club where a group of young wannabes strut around pretending to be something they’re not. You’d be surprised at just how many of these there are.

The leaders of these high school gangs are usually affiliated with a low ranking triad member, called a 49 in triad lexicon. These are the foot soldiers. The 49 functions as big brother whose help the boys would call on in case of trouble, but big brother is also a scout who kept an eye out for promising young talent.

I must’ve seemed like one, because I was soon introduced to the 49er’s tailou (big brother), who was also a 49er. We met a few times at a local disco, snorted cocaine, gargled ketamine, popped ecstasy, and soon he trusted me enough to put me in charge of a few high-school gangs.

What Is It Like For A Woman To Go From Physically Unattractive To Attractive

September 19, 2017 4 Comments

It feels good most of the time, but it can be quite frustrating. Many people assume I’ve always looked the way I do now, and that as a result I must be a snob, or have some sort of sense of entitlement.

My case is extreme in the sense that I went from literally being invisible to men for the majority of my life, to receiving comments daily from men all over the world telling me I’m beautiful. As an adult film performer I am somewhat in the public eye, so I get a lot of attention for and comments about my appearance.

What Was It Like To Be Gassed At A Nazi Concentration Camp

September 6, 2017 5 Comments