Caveman Circus
The Most Awesome Men's Entertainment Site On The Internet
I knew I had a problem when I realized I couldn’t watch a movie without checking my phone every ten minutes.
It wasn’t just movies. Waiting for food, sitting in a taxi or standing in line—every empty moment became something I needed to fill.
So six months ago, I deleted TikTok and Instagram and stopped watching Reels, Shorts and anything else that allowed me to scroll endlessly.
[Read more…] about “I Stopped Watching Short-Form Content for Six Months.”
I’ve spent the past ten years working as a professional matchmaker. During that time, I’ve interviewed thousands of single people, listened to both sides of more dates than I could possibly count, and learned that what people say they want is not always the same as what actually makes them happy.
I now run my own matchmaking company, but I started out working for a larger agency. In those early years, I believed good matchmaking was mostly about finding someone who checked the right boxes: the appropriate age, education, career, appearance, religion and lifestyle. Those things still matter, but experience has taught me that compatibility is much more difficult to reduce to a list.
I’m 6 feet 9 inches tall—about 206 centimeters—and yes, that is my real height.
I have pituitary gigantism, and I come from a tall family, but even among tall people I stand out. In most rooms, I’m not merely the tallest woman. I’m the tallest person, period.
[Read more…] about “I’m a 6’9” Woman. This Is What Life Looks Like From Up Here.”
I want to tell you something I’ve never said out loud.
I’m 55 years old, and I’ve never been in a romantic relationship. Not once. Not a high school sweetheart, not a college fling, not even a whirlwind dating-app romance that crashed and burned in a few weeks. Nothing.
And it wasn’t because I didn’t want love. I did. I still do.
But I waited.
I’m sixteen, which in Korea means I’m almost a finished product.
That’s how it feels, anyway. By your third year of high school, people start talking about your “specs”—test scores, clubs, volunteer hours—and your face like they’re items on the same checklist. At cram school, the girls trade math tips and moisturizer samples. On the group chat, we swap past exams and plastic-surgery clinic screenshots. When adults ask what I plan to do after graduation, they mean both college and whether I’ll “fix” anything. It’s said kindly, like asking if I’ve bought a new backpack.
[Read more…] about What It’s Like Being a Teenage Girl in South Korea
I never planned on being a stripper. It started with modeling gigs and chasing whatever jobs would pay the bills. Somebody told me I had the right look and suggested I try stripping, and honestly, the money was better and the attention was addicting in its own way. At first, you get some basic training—how to move, how to read a crowd, how to keep things fun and sexy without crossing lines that’ll get you thrown out. But over time, you realize there aren’t really any hard lines at all, especially once you step out of the club and into private parties.
[Read more…] about Confessions of a Male Stripper: What Really Happens at Bachelorette Parties
1. We had a teacher unwrap a piece of candy and pass it around the room. The last person was asked if they would eat the candy after everyone had touched it. This was meant to symbolize purity or some shit but was foiled when my friend ate the candy lmao
I remember the exact moment when the walls of reality began to splinter. It wasn’t dramatic, like a shattering windowpane, but slow, creeping—a widening fissure in the foundation of my mind. One moment, I was simply tripping, colors sliding over one another like warm oil on a hot skillet. The next, the trip was tripping me.
[Read more…] about Eighteen Days in the Void: A Psychotic Break After LSD
At five in the morning, the world begins to forgive everyone except you.
The sky outside the window turns from black to a pale, bruised blue. The first birds begin chirping as if nothing terrible has happened. Somewhere, a delivery truck groans down the street. A neighbor starts a shower. Coffee machines click on in quiet kitchens.
The ordinary world is waking up, and you are still trapped in last night.
[Read more…] about What 5 A.M. Feels Like After a Cocaine Binge
Let me tell you something weird about my job: I make $40–50k a month renting out other people’s fantasy lives. Exotic cars. Yachts. Watches. Mansions. If it glitters or gets likes, chances are I’ve put it in someone’s hands—for a price.
I didn’t get into this business to become a middleman for influencers and wannabe moguls. I’m a car guy. Always have been. I started small. A TRX and a Porsche on Turo. A couple of beachside Airbnbs with golf carts and baseball season tickets included in the bundle. It was a scrappy hustle, but it worked. Year one was decent. Year two was great. By year three I was building an empire. Now? A few million in cars. A few more in real estate. And a Rolodex filled with the fakest people you’ll ever meet.