Man-Up

The Daily Man-Up: 7 Ways Society Can Make A Man Soft

August 23, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

1. By praising weakness.

In some corners of our society you’re actually praised for being a victim. The more arbitrary victim classes you belong to, the higher status you hold. You’re seen as strong, for being weak.

If you don’t watch out for it, you can find yourself being proud of being a victim, and your victimhood may not actually be real, nor should you want it to be. You’re a man. A man cannot be a victim unless he gives his permission. If he does, he also relinquishes power over his current and future life as a victim depends on others to succeed, to be ‘allowed and enabled’ to succeed.

This victimhood goes deeper, especially now with men, as we’re seeing other groups praise men’s vulnerability and condemn the stoicism that actually leads to a life well lived.

We’re being pushed to dive into our feelings, to explore them, to express them, and in doing so, we’re giving our emotions and feelings power over our mood, our actions, and what we ‘feel’ like we can accomplish in this life.

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The Daily Man-Up

August 22, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @wadeaustinellis)

I keep hearing about “adulting” and how hard it is. Well, it is hard and doesn’t get easier.

At almost 60, I still get scared, overwhelmed and don’t know what to do sometimes. I still have sleepless nights and wonder what the hell I’m going to do about some situations. The difference is I can use my experience in prior situations to assess the current one. Or, even better, I have a circle of family/friends/professionals that I can go to for advice. Ones that I trust, not the one on the next barstool or such.

But inside, I still feel like I’m 25! I like splashing in puddles, I sit in awe of a star-filled sky, I blow bubbles even when I’m not with the grandkids. I love shopping for new and different clothes in out of the way places, I still travel alone to places that interest me. I love to cook and try new things. I stay out late and sleep in sometimes, just not every weekend lol. I take up new hobbies and endeavors because they seem interesting. I still reach out to strangers and make new friends, so that I don’t get bored. And I LOVE a good whisky and the occasional drunk!

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The Daily Man-Up: Why Women Test You

August 21, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @stairhopper)

We’ve all gotten it, the proverbial test women will throw at us, either when we first meet, or when we start dating, or much further down the line. I keep seeing men freeze up in these tests, often forgetting that…

These tests are a good thing!

First, let’s take a look at how she will test;

She will test by complaining, challenging, changing her mind, doubting and distracting.

Those are the main forms in which she will test you. I do have to point out something that many of you might not have the stomach to accept:

Stop hoping for it to get easier. As you grow in success so will her testing.

Yep, there isn’t some kind of testing threshold you need to pass before she gets all cute and happy ever after. The more of a man you become, the more she will test you. The more successful you become – with women, with business, with your goals and passions and indeed, in life itself, the harder you will be tested for it.

Why she tests

I said earlier that a woman testing you is a good thing, and I meant it.

Understand this; women will test you to feel your masculine core.

Yes. It is through discovering your unshakable masculinity that she comes to understand her own femininity.

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The Daily Man-Up: Reading Is To The Mind What Exercise Is To Your Body

August 20, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(Photo by João Silas )

Reading puts your brain to work.

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to your body.

It gives us freedom to roam the expanse of space, time, history, and offer a deeper view of ideas, concepts, emotions, and body of knowledge.

Roberto Bolaño says“Reading is like thinking, like praying, like talking to a friend, like expressing your ideas, like listening to other people’s ideas, like listening to music, like looking at the view, like taking a walk on the beach.”

Your brain on books is active — growing, changing and making new connections and different patterns, depending on the type of material you’re reading.

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The Daily Man-Up: Thought And Purpose

August 17, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @cristofer)

Until thought is linked with purpose there is no intelligent accomplishment. With the majority the barque of thought is allowed to drift upon the ocean of life. Aimlessness is a vice, and such drifting must not continue for him who would steer clear of catastrophe and destruction.

They who have no central purpose in their life fall an easy prey to petty worries, fears, troubles, and self-pitying, all of which lead, just as surely as deliberately planned sins (though by a different route), to failure, unhappiness, and loss, for weakness cannot persist in a power-evolving universe.

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The Daily Man-Up: You Are Where You’re Suppose To Be Right Now

August 16, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

Stop. Stop questioning. Stop over-thinking. Stop looking back and trying to measure where you’ve been or how far you have left to go. Stop telling yourself you aren’t there yet, or aren’t good enough.

Stop.

Because right where you are in this moment—even in all this imperfection and mess and steps still left to take—is exactly where you’re supposed to be.

Thousands of moments led up to this. Hundreds of decisions and actions. Millions of tiny thoughts and mistakes and blessings have brought you are. And here is good.

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The Daily Man-Up: Are You The Man She Wants or The One She’ll Settle For?

August 15, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @joanna_nix)

What women really want in a man?

The simple answer to the question above…confidence.

Yes, the elusive quality that every woman says they’re looking for in a man. Guys think that it equates to being aloof, emotionally distant, and kind of an asshole – but those are just insecurities posing as confidence.

What a woman really values is a guy who values himself.

A guy who has standards and specific qualities he looks for in a partner. A guy who wants someone who will genuinely respect him and will be excited to invest back in him.

A guy that isn’t going to settle for just anyone.

Women want men who have options. They want to feel like they actually have to earn your approval (not that they just got it because they’re hot and/or you’re lonely.) They have to feel like they could lose you if you’re not getting the connection you desire.

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The Daily Man-Up: A Short Insight on Dealing With Regret

August 14, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

(photo: @mbennettphoto)

“How do I deal with regrets and failures?”

By Accepting them.

We all fail in our lives, and we all have regrets. I can think of plenty of times in my life where I have felt the sting of failure as well as regret, but that is an intrinsic part of life.

Failure and regret bring us pain, and pain leads us to discomfort. Humans, by nature, don’t like discomfort. When we feel it, we are compelled almost by instinct to regain a state of comfort. In order to do that, we must make a change, and in order to change, we must grow.

By accepting this, you begin to see your failures and regrets differently.

You begin to understand that a failure, when learned from, isn’t actually a failure at all, but a lesson. And this is what makes you grow as a person.

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The Daily Man-Up: A Woman’s O-Face

August 13, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

o face

An O-face is by far the sexiest and most seductive thing in the world to me.

To a man, or at least to me, my GF O-face silently reassures “You are everything society has told you you should be. You have fulfilled the most important role of what a man is supposed to be and have been deemed worthy. You are such a manly, manly man that I have completely lost all control of myself, down to my most basic motor and language skills. You have unraveled me, and I am falling apart beneath you, yet I trust you so completely to be totally and absolutely vulnerable before you. You make me happy and are the only one who can make me feel this way. Also, in ways that can be scientifically quantified, your dick gets me extremely high.”

My GF’s eyes always grow really wide, and search my own. I can see surprise, love, and a dash of fright in hers. I can read “I will love you forever, and for this brief instant I see, feel, hear, smell, and taste nothing but you. You are my entire universe for a handful of seconds. I have some reservations about trusting anyone this much, but make love to me. Gentle or rough, just satisfy yourself and have me completely.”

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The Daily Man-Up: Flank Your Mind

August 10, 2018 | No Comments » | Topics: Man-Up |

A post shared by David Goggins (@davidgoggins) on

Sometimes with the mind a full-on frontal assault doesn’t work. You have to learn different tactics. You have to learn how to sometimes flank your mind. You have to sometimes fool the enemy which is your mind into thinking that you are allowing it to take the easiest route. Let the mind think it has won! 

When it believes that it has beaten you into submission, it will then release its grasp on you because the mind feels it has won. It’s like it is raising its arms in victory. While the mind’s arms are raised in victory, the mind is defenseless while you are planning your counter attack. Basically all you are doing is weakening that strong feeling to not do what you don’t want to do. And once it’s dropped its defenses, you can strike with full force. 

There are a lot of times in life when you don’t want to study, go for that run, do the work project, etc. Just tell yourself that you are just going to start on it today, maybe not finish the whole job at one time. Just tell yourself you are going to run 3 miles rather than the 20 originally planned. What this does is that it relaxes the mind. A big project is stressful, a long run is stressful, etc., but just starting it or running only 2 alleviates the stress and some of the suffering that comes with it. But, as we all know, once you get started on something, your mind will shift. It will run the extra miles, put more time into the project. 

Let your mind think you are negotiating with it, then crush it when it least expects it!

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