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Theodore Lee

Confessions of a Professional Matchmaker

I’ve spent the past ten years working as a professional matchmaker. During that time, I’ve interviewed thousands of single people, listened to both sides of more dates than I could possibly count, and learned that what people say they want is not always the same as what actually makes them happy.

I now run my own matchmaking company, but I started out working for a larger agency. In those early years, I believed good matchmaking was mostly about finding someone who checked the right boxes: the appropriate age, education, career, appearance, religion and lifestyle. Those things still matter, but experience has taught me that compatibility is much more difficult to reduce to a list.

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Poll of the Day

death date

You can know the exact date and cause of your death. Once you learn it, nothing can change it. Do you want to know?
Results

“My boyfriend put our marriage plans on hold right after his salary doubled”

new salary

My partner, 36M, and I, 31F, have been together for four and a half years and were friends for several years before that.

He works in tech and I work in education, so he was already earning more than me. Two months ago, though, he accepted a new position that more than doubled his salary. He now makes almost three times what I do.

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How Romantic Movies Helped Create the “Nice Guy”

nice guys in movies

For decades, movies have taught men that getting a woman is mostly a matter of refusing to accept her first answer.

If she says she isn’t interested, keep trying. If she has a boyfriend, prove that you understand her better than he does. If she wants space, appear outside her house with music, flowers, cue cards or some enormous public declaration that makes rejecting you socially uncomfortable. Eventually, she will realize that you were the right guy all along.

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Linkage

Young People Are Obsessed With This Simple Retirement-Savings Formula – Archive.ph

26 Memes for Anyone Already Over This Week – Ned Hardy

I replaced all my basic tee shirts with this brand. They wear really good, are really comfortable, durable and 100% cotton! – Amazon

US to announce sharply lower vehicle fuel economy requirements – Reuters

The 25 Greatest Rock Bassists of All Time – Spin Magazine

Higher semaglutide dose is associated with lower neuropsychiatric event incidence independent of weight loss – Nature

He uncovered wasteful LA homelessness spending. So why was he removed as audit chair? – LAist

29 People Who Ended Their Marriages After 25+ Years Reveal the Final Straw – Ned Hardy

A blood pressure monitor is absolutely necessary because high blood pressure often has no symptoms, and regularly checking it at home is one of the only ways to catch dangerous levels early before they lead to heart attack, stroke, or kidney damage. – Amazon

Whatever happened to kindness? Spoiler alert: Our readers prove it’s alive and well – NPR

Chinese livestreamer dances almost nonstop for 4–6 hours, every time viewers send gifts, she has to dance – Reddit

2 of the Universe’s Great Mysteries May Have Their Own Dimension – Wired

Elon Musk told ex-girlfriend he needed ‘a legion of children before the civil war’ – The Guardian

Apple’s $2,000-Plus Foldable iPhone Was a Decade in the Making – Archive.ph

WWE legend Ric Flair claims ‘influencer talent agency’ duped him into handing over his digital life – Independent

If You Didn’t Post It, Did You Even Live?

influencer

There was a time when sharing good news required effort. You called someone. You met them for dinner. You trapped a coworker near the copier and made them look at four poorly developed photographs from your trip to Cancun.

Now you can inform 900 people, including your high school lab partner, a former landlord, and three women you vaguely remember from a wedding—that your toddler successfully used the toilet.

This is called progress.

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Poll of the Day

sophies_choice

You can save your spouse or your child from a sinking car. You only have time to reach one. Who do you save?
Results

“I can’t get over how easily my girlfriend slept with me”

red flag

My girlfriend and I kissed on our third date when we first started seeing each other. That night, we became intimate, and about two weeks later, we had sex for the first time. She was a virgin, and I was her first sexual partner.

We have now been together for a year and three months. Our relationship is great, and I genuinely believe she is someone I could marry. But there is one thing I cannot seem to get past. I keep thinking about how quickly she trusted me and became intimate with me.

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