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Just a quick note for anyone who needs to hear this:
You’re not behind. Period.
Nor are you ahead! We know this because whenever you observe the natural world anywhere, you’ll never see anything that’s ahead or behind. Even if one tree, somewhere out in the forest, grows more quickly than the one next to it, this wouldn’t mean that the slower tree is behind.
Respect is an overlooked and misunderstood idea in the pursuit of being an attractive man. Growing up, parents and teachers repeatedly told us to respect others. Because of this, a lot of us became obsessed with pleasing everyone else while forgetting ourselves. Our self-respect was pushed to second place.
So we try our hardest to respect women, but that alone doesn’t give us the dating life we want. That frustration leads us to believe we need to be douchebags to become Casanovas. It’s a myth perpetuated by insecure men.
Reading puts your brain to work.
Reading is to the mind what exercise is to your body.
It gives us freedom to roam the expanse of space, time, history, and offer a deeper view of ideas, concepts, emotions, and body of knowledge.
Roberto Bolaño says, “Reading is like thinking, like praying, like talking to a friend, like expressing your ideas, like listening to other people’s ideas, like listening to music, like looking at the view, like taking a walk on the beach.”
Let’s address the elephant in the room.
Perhaps you grew up in less than ideal circumstances, faced prejudice due to your race, gender, or sexuality, battled health issues, or constantly felt out of place because of your accent or location.
You feel that the universe dealt you a unique hand, making it impossible for your setbacks to be your own doing. Yet, deep within, there’s a nagging feeling that we are often our own biggest obstacle.
Why? Because acknowledging this means we have the power to rewrite our story. If we don’t, the blame squarely falls on our shoulders. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, realizing that we might be the only thing standing in the way of our dreams and aspirations.
Pointing fingers elsewhere is just so much simpler.
But hear me out. I’m not saying you lack ambition or drive. Taking the reins of your life is no small feat. It’s a journey filled with discomfort and moments of self-doubt.
Our instinct is to shield ourselves from pain, often leading us to find external culprits for our woes. Yet, breaking free from this mindset is possible.
In essence, life is about owning your narrative. And when you do, you’ll find that the most compelling chapters are yet to be written.
Life is unpredictable. While you may not have control over every event that unfolds, you have the undeniable power to choose your response. You’re the captain of your emotional ship.
External events might sway and rock your boat, but you decide whether to sail through or let the waves capsize you.
Every reaction, whether instinctive or deliberate, is a testament to your resilience and adaptability.
Embracing this control means understanding that while you can’t always dictate the winds, you can adjust your sails.
Despite all of our differences, the main thing that we are all striving for is happiness. Ask anyone to cut the bullshit and tell you what they really want – what their heart truly desires – and they will say that they want to be happy. This happens 100% of the time. So, if all of us have the same ultimate goal, then why is true happiness so hard to find?
Your odds of success increase if you stop abusing yourself.
So what’s self-abuse? It’s whenever you insult, bully, judge, punish, or even overly-push yourself. Where, if you were to treat someone else the way you treat YOU, most people would think you’re being an asshole – that’s self-abuse.
You’re not just going to wake up as a productive supersoldier.
You have to start implementing seemingly small changes today, and building on them every day or every week.
Our bodies and minds don’t like dramatic change of any kind, so you need to take small steps in the right direction.
Get up 15 minutes earlier than usual, not 3 hours.
The first and most important rule of life, is to have some rules and principles by which you operate from and live by.
Your success, happiness and level of fulfillment will be dictated to you by the rules you have for yourself and the standard you set and accept for yourself.
If you want to thrive, if you want to blossom into the most beautiful and magnificent and powerful version of yourself then you need to develop your very own “modus operandi” – the way in which you operate, conduct yourself and perform.
(photo: @tcrawlers)
Regardless of where you live, how many resources you have access to, or which talents you possess, you have 24 hours in a day–just like everybody else. We lead busy lives and use our limited time as an excuse to procrastinate and avoid getting things done, but often claiming we don’t have time is a lie. It’s a lie we tell others and ourselves. It helps us believe we’ll never get anything done, and this is a problem. Fortunately, the solution might be as simple as changing your language
Wall Street Journal writer Laura Vanderkam explains:
Instead of saying “I don’t have time” try saying “it’s not a priority,” and see how that feels. Often, that’s a perfectly adequate explanation. I have time to iron my sheets, I just don’t want to. But other things are harder. Try it: “I’m not going to edit your résumé, sweetie, because it’s not a priority.” “I don’t go to the doctor because my health is not a priority.” If these phrases don’t sit well, that’s the point. Changing our language reminds us that time is a choice. If we don’t like how we’re spending an hour, we can choose differently.
It’s a simple idea, and a great one. Our language is often used to provide a polite answer when the truth might be hard to hear. Sometimes we even subject ourselves to more polite language and end up in situations like this one. How you use your time is very important. It’s a limited resource and shouldn’t be wasted. Don’t risk putting it to poor use by failing to be honest with yourself and others about your priorities in life. Alter your language and you may just discover what’s most important.
One of the oldest rules of personal finance is the simple admonition to pay yourself first. All the money books tell you to do it. All the personal finance blogs say it, too. Even your parents have given you the same advice.
But it’s hard. That money could be used someplace else. You could pay the phone bill, could pay down debt, could buy a new DVD player. You’ve tried once or twice in the past, but it’s so easy to forget. You don’t keep a budget, so when payday rolls around, the money just finds its way elsewhere.
And besides: What does “pay yourself first” even mean?
