Theodore Lee

I’m a 45-year-old man, happily married for 20 years. My wife (43) is my best friend. We recently relocated for work, and I’ve been partnered at my new job with a 32-year-old colleague who’s also married.

Over the past year, we’ve built a strong, productive rapport—complementary skills, long hours, great results. Management pairs us often. But after a recent trade show, something shifted. We spent the week side by side, and during our long conversation on the way home, I realized I was crushing on her—hard.

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I’ve been married to my husband for five years—we’re both 27. Whenever we fight, he resorts to name-calling and says things that are deeply disrespectful. I know he had a tough childhood and tends to shut down emotionally, while I’m more anxious and communicative. I’ve tried to understand his reactions, but it still hurts.

I’ve brought this up many times over the years, but it doesn’t change. I admit I’ve stooped to his level once or twice, trying to mirror back what it feels like, but it’s not how I want to be. I believe fights shouldn’t be free-for-alls. There should be boundaries, even in anger.

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I’m a 35-year-old woman who grew up watching my parents fight constantly—they’re still together, but I promised myself I’d never end up in a relationship like theirs. Now, I’m single and every man I meet somehow falls short. I’m beginning to wonder if I have commitment issues.

Deep down, I dream of a fairytale ending—meeting someone wonderful and living happily ever after. But I also fear settling down with the wrong person and being trapped in an unhappy life like my parents. It’s confusing and lonely, and I don’t know how to move past this fear.

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My boyfriend (24M) and I (24F) have been together for over six years, since we were 18. We’ve built a serious life together—shared finances, a house deposit, career growth, and close ties with each other’s families. We function like a married couple in every way except the title.

Two years ago, he said he’d propose once I finished university. Since then, he’s continued to promise an engagement, but nothing has happened. I’ve told him I don’t care about the how—I just want to be engaged and moving toward marriage. He says he wants the same future with me, but when I ask what’s holding him back, he just says, “I don’t know.”

At this point, I feel like I’m begging for a proposal. So I’ve set a boundary: if he doesn’t propose by the end of the year, I’m ending the relationship.

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I recently asked my husband how he felt about our relationship, and during a difficult but honest conversation, he admitted something that shattered me: he wishes he had accomplished more in life, but feels it’s too late now. He looked so tired and defeated when he said it. I haven’t stopped crying since.

He’s not unsuccessful, just not where he once hoped to be—and I’ve always believed in his potential. Now I’m overwhelmed with sadness and guilt, wondering if I held him back. I wish I could go back and tell the younger version of him that life is still full of possibilities. I’m sorry if my own emotional struggles—depression, anxiety, postpartum—kept me from being the partner he needed. I feel like I dragged him down.

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