Eat sleep go to work, repeat. Where’s the adventure? Where’s the romance ? Seems like we are all slaving away to the rat race and have no time for passion projects. The monotony of routine is killing me
Advice Column
“I don’t mind that my girlfriend cheated on me”
My girlfriend recently cheated at a party, but I didn’t feel angry or want to break up. That reaction confused my closest friends, who think I’m making a big mistake by staying.
For context, I’m introverted and have always preferred a small circle, coding, and anime over big social expectations. I’ve never dreamed of marriage or kids, and I believe a relationship is worthwhile as long as it makes you happy. I would never cheat, but I also don’t feel the deep sense of betrayal others describe.
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“He only comes over for sex and ignores me otherwise”
I’ve been casually seeing this guy for about six times now, and I’m starting to feel uncomfortable. Only the first time we met, we did something other than sex. After that, every single time has just been sex and nothing else.
I know he probably doesn’t like me that much, but I still expect him to treat me like a friend at least. I don’t want a serious relationship with him. At the time before last, I asked him if we could do something other than sex, and he said, “Like what?” I told him, “Anything”. But last time we only had sex so nothing changed…
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“My Fiancé thinks I can’t change unless he teaches me a lesson.”
My fiancé (34M) and I (30F) have been together for 5 years and living together for 1.5 years.
This morning, while I was cleaning the kitchen (I do all the cleaning) and already working from home, he came in at 7:30am and asked if I was the last person to shower. I said yes and mentioned I bathed the dog last night. He said the shower head was turned toward the door and sprayed him, getting his shirt wet. I apologized right away—I’ve accidentally done this once before while cleaning.
Then he asked me to go turn it off. I was confused why he left the water running, came to get me, and let it spray all over the floor. I rushed into the bathroom, turned it off, and grabbed towels. He stood in the doorway and asked, “About how long will it take you to finish cleaning?” which made me angry. I threw a towel down, rushed out, and told him he could go shower.
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“My husband’s female friend uses the excuse ‘we’re like brother and sister’ to be inappropriate…”
I’ve been with my husband for 3 years, married for 2. He has a female friend who jumps into his arms when she sees him, which has always made me a little uncomfortable. I talked to him about it once, but since it wasn’t a huge issue, I let it go.
We hang out with her family sometimes, and she lives out of town, so we don’t see her often. This past weekend she was visiting. When she arrived, she did the jump-into-his-arms thing, which I expected.
Then she sat on his lap. She looked at me and asked, “This is ok, right?” It really wasn’t, but with everyone around I didn’t want to seem jealous, so I shrugged it off. She asked again a few minutes later. And again. Later she told me they’re like “brother and sister” and mentioned his ex-wife didn’t like it, calling her a bitch.
“I might have fallen for an escort”
I met up with an escort last night, (haven’t seen her for over year, but before that we saw each other frequently). We get on really well which makes this confusing… we are friendly and have each other’s numbers, and social media’s so unlike how l would assume an escort would act.
Whilst we were in bed, kissing and getting handsy we had the condoms on the night stand ready to go and before I knew it she has guided me into her raw – which I didn’t mind (I’m clean) and I’m assuming she is to (I’ve grown to trust her). She asks during it if I’m okay to pull out, which I say yes to and I do every time we had sex last night. [Read more…] about “I might have fallen for an escort”
“I broke my wife and I don’t think it is fixable”
I broke my wife and I don’t think it is fixable.
This happened 6 months ago. And I only chose to talk now because I don’t see improvement in sight and I am hopeless.
We were at a party. My friend is single and we started talking about love and relationships. My wife and I have been happily married for 7 years. We have 3 beautiful children. She is the love of my life. When I was talking to my friend I felt like we were on different levels of thinking. His complaints are mostly superficial about how the people he dated looked. I was a bit drunk at that point and said something like “you don’t fall in love with looks, look at me and my wife I love her more than anything compared to my ex who was just looks.” Everyone went silent and my damage control was worse so I ended up shutting the hell up.
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“My kids are complete idiots.”
I (46F) have traveled all around the world since I was a teenager. I always booked (and paid for) my own travel, found amazing deals, got to airports on time, had everything I needed to travel, and was able to navigate through foreign cities with relative ease. My kids though (28M & 17F) are total dumbasses. They can’t book their own travel even though I’ve told them the best sites. If they do try they end up spending 4x what they needed to.
“My wife’s been having a 5-year affair”
I recently found out that my wife has been having an affair for the past five years. Five years. Half of our marriage. The part that stings the most isn’t just the betrayal, it’s that she feels almost no remorse. When we talked, she said it “just happened,” that she “needed something for herself,” and then she blamed me. She said I was emotionally distant, that I stopped making her feel wanted.
And here’s the painful part, I can’t completely deny it. Somewhere along the way, I got caught up in work, in being a dad, in just trying to keep everything afloat. I stopped paying attention to her the way I used to. So yeah, I can see how I contributed to the distance.
“How do you stop feeling jealous of people that have easier lives than you?”
I am 35 years old. I have a steady job that pays the bills and lets me save a little each month, but not much more than that. There are no vacations, no splurges, and no big leaps forward. Just the same routine every month — work, bills, and a little left over.
I try to be grateful that I am not drowning in debt or struggling to make rent, but it is hard not to look around and feel envious. Friends are buying homes, taking trips, or getting help from their families to build the kind of life I can only imagine. I know everyone’s situation is different, but sometimes it feels like I am doing everything right and still falling behind.
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