Advice Column

Here’s what my week looks like.

Monday to Friday I’m up at 5 a.m. for work. I feed the cats and leave, usually getting off around 4 p.m. Sometimes my wife asks me to pick her up from work. It’s a little out of the way, but I don’t mind. I used to be happy to do it.

She’ll often say she needs personal space after a long day. Fine. But she’ll get in the car talking on the phone with her parents, laughing and chatting the whole ride home. The second we park, she hangs up, goes inside, changes, and disappears into her room without even saying a word to me.

Meanwhile I feed the cats again, clean the litter box, cook dinner, wash the dishes, and then leave for my second job.

[Read more…] about “My life with my wife is miserable”

Hi, I’m a 26-year-old male in a long-distance relationship with a 26-year-old woman. I tend to overthink about things she does. I really love her, but sometimes my overthinking leads to small issues.

For example, yesterday she had a function to attend, a wedding event for her friend, and she went with some of her friends. Because I’m protective of her, I asked how she was going and how she was coming, and she tells me everything.

She told me she would be coming with a bunch of her friends and told me the exact time she left the event. I know how much time it takes her to reach home from that event, approximately 15 minutes, but it took almost 45 minutes. She was online sometimes and didn’t even message me.

[Read more…] about “Am I being too clingy??”

My friend gets jealous of me very easily. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around her every time I see her.

When she got angry, she would give others the silent treatment for however long she felt like it. It could be days, weeks, months or even years. She and I were talking about music. She got angry and jealous that I mentioned I have 2 electric guitars. I did not know that was going to be such a sensitive topic for her. She stopped talking to me for a year after that. She did not explain why she went silent.

[Read more…] about “I have to walk on eggshells around my friend”

I’m 39 and I’ve never been in a relationship or been physically intimate with anyone. Not once.

I live in a major U.S. city and work as a senior engineer for a well-known tech company. On paper, my life looks solid. I make good money and have built a strong career. I go to a monthly board game meetup and volunteer at neighborhood cleanups. I try to be social. I ask people about their lives, suggest grabbing food after events, and make an effort to stay connected.

I work out most weekdays. I take care of myself. Good hygiene, a simple skincare routine, regular haircuts, clean clothes. I’m 5’9”, about 145 pounds, and in good shape. I’ve been on multiple dating apps for years and barely get any matches.

[Read more…] about “I’m 39 and scared I will never get married and have kids”

I’ve always laughed off the term “work spouse,” but today something shifted. My coworker Laura made a joke that only we would get, and my first instinct wasn’t to tell my spouse—it was to keep it as our thing.

I realized I’ve been sharing more of my daily emotional highs and lows with someone at a desk than with the person I share a bed with. My spouse hasn’t done anything wrong, but I’ve been emotionally lazy. I’m shutting it down starting tomorrow.

Has anyone else caught themselves sliding into an emotional affair without realizing it? How did you fix the distance at home?

[Read more…] about “I realized today that I am a work-husband with a coworker and I feel sick about it”

Me (27m) and my girlfriend (25f) been together for about 10 months. Lately I’ve started noticing she’s really weird about her phone. Keeps it face down all the time, turns off notifications when I’m around, and takes it with her even if she’s just stepping out for a minute.

She used to be more open, like showing me memes or stuff from her chats, but now it’s like the phone is some top secret device. I’m not the kind of guy who snoops, and I haven’t gone through it, but I can’t lie – it’s starting to bother me.

I asked her if something’s up, she just said “I like my privacy”. That’s all. No explanation.

Is this a red flag? I wanna trust her, but it’s hard not to feel like she’s hiding something. Anyone been through this?

[Read more…] about “Is it a red flag if my gf hides their phone around me?”

My wife and I have been together for about a decade and we have three young kids together. For most of our relationship she was never someone who put a lot of effort into her appearance. She was always naturally beautiful, but she did not really dress up or focus much on how she looked.

A couple of years ago she went through a phase where she felt like she did not have an identity outside of being a mom. Since then she has started traveling more, joining social groups, dressing up, and wearing makeup.

[Read more…] about “Is it wrong for me to not compliment my wife so that she won’t become vain?”