Category: Advice Column

I can’t stand my husband anymore. We’ve been together six years, married for one, and we have an eight month old baby. He’s always been bigger, but about a year and a half ago his weight got out of control and now he’s over 400 pounds. I understand people change, but he refuses to do anything about it.

He has no energy and is constantly falling asleep, even while driving, which is terrifying. I’ve begged him to go to the doctor for years and he just won’t go. He always says he will, but never follows through. He’s on my insurance, so coverage isn’t the issue.

My sister just got engaged and we went out to a nice dinner to celebrate. It wasn’t super fancy, but definitely the kind of place where you try to act a little more put together. Everything was going fine and we were doing toasts.

Her fiancé gave a speech and said how much he loved that she’s “so honest” and “never hides anything.” That hit me weird because she absolutely has hidden things before, especially from me.

About 10 years ago, she secretly dated one of my close friends for months. I only found out because I walked in on them. It caused a huge issue and I ended up losing that friendship. She never really apologized, just brushed it off as us being young.

I wasn’t planning to say anything, but I’d had a couple drinks and ended up muttering something like, “yeah unless she decides to keep it a secret.” The room went quiet immediately.

I’m a 35-year-old woman, divorced for about 8 years, with a 9-year-old son. I had been dating someone for almost 4 years who also has a son. Our kids became close very quickly, and before long, we were spending most of our time together and building a serious relationship.

Early on, I realized we weren’t fully compatible. Things weren’t bad, but our goals didn’t align, and every time we talked about the future, we got stuck. Still, we stayed together and kept going.

Today I got a Facebook message from someone claiming my husband was cheating on me with escorts. I asked for proof and they sent screenshots. I confronted my husband and he admitted that about a month ago he had contacted an escort but never showed up to the appointment.

Because he didn’t show up, the person has been demanding payment. Now there are two numbers threatening him, saying if he didn’t pay $4000 they would send everything to his wife. They followed through and contacted me.

Now they are threatening to come to our house.

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year, and overall things have been solid. We communicate well, support each other, and I’ve always made it a point to respect her independence. I’ve never tried to control what she wears, who she talks to, or what she posts.

But today she posted a picture of herself in a thong, facing away from the camera. It was just her, full view, with a cheeky caption. It completely caught me off guard because she’s never posted anything like that before.

So my wife (36F) today asks me how much I have in my savings account. We have been together for 6 years and married for one of those years in May. We don’t share bank accounts, her money is hers, and mine is mine. We are sitting cooking dinner in the air fryer when she just out of the blue asks, how much do you have in savings?

For me, it’s not any of her business and I told her that. Am I wrong for not telling her how much I have in savings?

Six years ago, I found out that my wife (40F) was unfaithful, and it hit me hard. At the time, I chose to stay for the sake of our young child, hoping to keep his life stable. Over the years, we’ve tried everything—couples counseling, therapy, you name it—trying to rebuild what was broken. But no matter how much effort we’ve put in, it hasn’t worked. Our relationship has become more of a partnership in parenting than a marriage. She’s a great mother to our kids, but the love we once had is gone. I see her more as a friend or a roommate now, not the woman I fell in love with. We’ve been together for almost 18 years, but it doesn’t feel like a marriage anymore.

My husband and his mom have an incredibly close bond. He’s the baby of the family, the one who stayed close to home, and they talk daily.

• We live across the street from them in a house they bought for us.
• We have dinner with them every Sunday and then again at their house every Monday.
• They watch our child for several hours every Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, but there’s always some criticism about my parenting.
• They buy something new for the baby every week, pay for our lawn service, bought our cars, and, of course, our house.