Advice Column

My 21-year-old daughter lives with her boyfriend, despite our wishes. We get along well and respect her choices, but he’s the only guy she’s ever dated. I hoped she’d use college to meet new people and have different experiences, but they stayed together and now live near his enabling family.

We’re not impressed with him—he’s immature, bad with money, lacks ambition, and has no real plans for his future. Meanwhile, our daughter is smart, driven, and planning for her master’s. Their finances are separate, but I worry she’s settling for comfort and doesn’t realize what she might be missing.

[Read more…] about “How do I convince my daughter her boyfriend is not the one?”

My wife had an ex she used to talk about all the time when we were dating. I knew everything about him—even random details. At first, she told me they broke up because he was a jerk, but really it was because he wasn’t ready to settle down.

Even after a year together, she kept bringing him up. Eventually, I lost it and told her I didn’t want to hear about him anymore. Then I found out she still had his contact info and cute photos of them saved on her phone. She said it was just so she could ask about travel details from trips they took together.

[Read more…] about “Wife renamed contact of ex boyfriend in phone to hide it from me.”

I’ve known this girl since childhood, but only recently realized I have feelings for her. She lives a few hours away, so I messaged her to catch up, and then asked if she’d be open to something more. She said she’s too busy with work and life right now, but appreciated my honesty.

I thanked her for being upfront and said I’d still like to be friends. She agreed, but made it clear she doesn’t want to lead me on, since she’s seen friends get stuck hoping for more in these situations.

[Read more…] about “Am I permanently stuck in the friendzone?”

I’ve been married to my wife 12 years and we have 3 wonderful kids. I found out she has been cheating on me with my besfriend. They were sleeping together for 4 months in our home, and I was destroyed. I even read the dirty text messages she would send him

I decided to take her back like nothing happened. My family told me I need go be a Man Right now and move on, my family is disappointed in me for staying. My friends and family don’t want anything to doo with her

I think I stayed because she’s all I know, we met when we were young. If I leave I’m scared I’ll die alone.

Did I make the wrong decision?

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I’ve been married to my husband for 11 years, together for almost 15, and we have two young boys. A few years ago, I cheated—not because of anything he did, but because I felt bored and restless with my life and choices. I regret it deeply.

The affair lasted about 7 months and ended before my husband found out. When he did, things got rough—lots of fighting, apologies, talk of divorce. Eventually, we decided to stay together, but he refused marriage counseling.

[Read more…] about “My husband hasn’t forgiven my past affair and no longer loves me.”

I have been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years now and I love her a lot, but I don’t think I can see us getting married. I would love to get married but I just don’t think she’s the one.

We have lots of good times but we also argue a lot. We have different core values which doesn’t help cause I feel like I can never voice my public opinion to her. I also like to have a life of my own sometimes, but it feels like she always has to be next to me.

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I’m a 51-year-old man, married to my best friend (48F). I love her deeply. We raised two sons (27 and 25), but they’re spoiled and entitled because their mom overprotects them. I can’t take it anymore.

Every time I try to bring up my frustrations, it’s like she’s a robot programmed to shut me down. If I try to talk to the boys, she steps in to defend them. I love my family, but I can’t keep paying for everything, ignoring the problems, or making excuses.

[Read more…] about “My wife still babies our adult sons”

My husband (29M) and I (27F) took in my best friend (22F) and her 3-year-old daughter after she had a bad breakup. We already have three kids—two boys (11 and 7) and a girl (4)—and live in a 3-bedroom, 1.5-bath house.

When my friend moved in, we didn’t set a timeline—just that she’d stay until she was back on her feet. It’s been three months. At first, she and her daughter stayed in the living room, but after a while, I convinced my husband and the boys to let them use the boys’ room. Our daughter moved into our bedroom with us, and my friend took over the boys’ room.

[Read more…] about “I let my best friend to move in to my family home.”

I’m looking for advice, especially from people in cross-cultural relationships or familiar with Vietnamese traditions.

I’m from a Western country and my girlfriend is from a village near Hanoi. We’ve been together almost two years, and I’m ready to marry her and bring her to live with me. I’m prepared to support her as she adapts and looks for work.

We’re running into conflict over wedding costs. She’s asking for a $10,000 dowry and says a traditional wedding will cost at least another $10,000. She also mentions that some weddings in her village cost $40,000–$75,000, including dowry.

[Read more…] about “My Vietnamese girlfriend wants a dowry and a $40,000 wedding”

I’m almost 20 and just went on my very first date this week. I was incredibly nervous beforehand, but the date went amazingly well. Since then, I can’t stop thinking about them—I’m glued to my phone, hoping for a text, responding instantly, and feeling jittery when I don’t hear back.

[Read more…] about “Is it weird to be crazy about someone after 1 date?”