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“He won’t marry me after 16 years and two kids”

wont marry me

I’m a 38 year old woman who has been dating a 40 year old man for 16 years. I feel so depressed and disposable because he won’t marry me.

We have been together for 16 whole years. We have two daughters (4 and 8). I wanted to be married before having kids but he basically said he thought that if he married me first then I might decide not to have any kids and he would be stuck never having any. So I was guilted into having them before being married.

I have felt horrible about my situation for years but last summer, about a month before our 16 year anniversary, I started to feel much worse. I’m depressed and I think about it multiple times a day. I feel like a joke. Like a disposable piece of trash. Like I’m not good enough to be loved completely.

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Why Men Need to Talk About Their Emotions

men emotions

Let’s face it, guys. We’ve been conditioned to believe that expressing our emotions is a sign of weakness, that “real men” are supposed to be stoic and unflappable in the face of life’s challenges. We’re taught to suck it up, to push down our feelings, to never let ’em see us sweat.

Well, I call B.S. on that. Not only is this emotional repression unhealthy, it’s also a one-way ticket to a miserable existence filled with broken relationships, stunted personal growth, and a gnawing sense of disconnection from ourselves and others.

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This Is Your Life – And It’s Ending One Minute at a Time

Life

We all like to pretend that we’ve got all the time in the world, like we’re the main character in some never-ending story. We procrastinate on our dreams, put off important conversations, and waste our days on meaningless trivialities, as if we’ve got an infinite number of tomorrows to make it all right.

Well, I’ve got news for you: you don’t. None of us do. Every second that ticks by is a second you’ll never get back, a tiny piece of your one wild and precious life that you’ve irretrievably spent.

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Linkage

Defend Yourself against AI Impostor Scams with a Safe Word – Scientific American

This is What it Would Look Like If Golden Age Hollywood Actors attended Warped Tour ’99 – Ned Hardy

My chair’s wheels used to get hung up on anything bigger than a gnat fart. Carpet? Might as well not have wheels. These? They rock and they let you glide smoothly and quietly across the room – Amazon

This Trick Will Help You Build Healthier Habits, Zero Effort Required – Hum

First Patient Begins Sickle Cell Gene Therapy That F.D.A. Approved – NY Times

Woman keeps a dummy phone incase she gets robbed in Brazil – Reddit

Three takeaways about the current state of batteries – MIT

Mexico: Surfers found dead in well were shot in head – BBC

Zendaya at the Met Gala: A Look Back At All Her Looks – Go Fug Yourself

8 handy iPhone keyboard tricks you might not know – Popular Science

Six Ways to Give Away Less of Your Personal Data – Life Hacker

Historical Photo of the Day – Ned Hardy

Do you really need a mattress protector? Yes you really do! Picture your mattress is a gym shirt. would you wear a gym shirt for 2 days in a row? what about everyday for 15 years? – Amazon

Proven practices to rewire your brain to help you live your best life – Fast Co

The rise of Sweden’s super rich – BBC

7 Signs You’re Going to Get Fired – Linkiest

Apple’s iPhone Spyware Problem Is Getting Worse. Here’s What You Should Know – WIRED

Amazon’s warehouse robot army keeps getting bigger and bigger – Business Insider

What’s happening at Tesla? Here’s what experts think – ARS Technica

WNBA ticket sales soar as interest grows in Caitlin Clark, Aces – Axios

Here’s the Cheapest Time to Travel to These Popular European Cities – Thrillist

“I lent a friend $25,000 and I want to be paid back.”

lent money to friend

I find myself in a frustrating and disheartening situation with a friend of mine. Over a year ago, I lent him a substantial amount of money – $25,000 to be exact. At the time, he assured me that he would pay me back as soon as he could. I trusted him, as a good friend should, and I believed he would honor his word.

However, as the months have dragged on, I’ve grown increasingly concerned about the repayment of this loan. Every time I gently bring up the subject, he always has an excuse ready. He tells me that he’s dealing with “bills” and that he’s struggling to make ends meet. I understand that life can be challenging at times, and I’ve tried to be patient and understanding.

But recently, I discovered that he had purchased a car. This news hit me like a ton of bricks. I couldn’t help but feel betrayed and upset. If he has the means to buy a car, surely he should be able to start paying me back, even if it’s in small installments. I’ve been there for him as a friend, and I feel like my kindness is being taken for granted.

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“Trying so hard not to fall into Red Pill”

Red Pill

My experiences with women have been terrible. No matter how much effort I put into putting myself out and listening to people’s advice, I’m always ending in the same outcome. Rejection. Rejection. Rejection. I’m pretty sure it’ll almost be 10 rejections in a row.

I just can’t understand why women don’t like me. I talk to them with the intention of getting to know them and be friendly and then I’ll show romantic interest. And as soon as I do, I’m rejected.

And I’m finding it really hard to believe height and race don’t matter. People will tell me “just go outside and you’ll see short/brown people in relationships” – but just cause you see it happen sometimes doesn’t mean it’s not insanely difficult.

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How Should I Respond When a Cop Asks Me If They Can Search My Vehicle?

how to respond when cop wants to search car

I was a police officer for twenty-five years and made hundreds of car stops and completed quite a few searches, so listen to this retired patrol commander:

In the simplest of terms, if a police officer asks your permission to do something, they are not allowed to do this thing without your permission or consent.

Just say the words, I do not consent to a search without a warrant.

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