Theodore Lee

So my wife (36F) today asks me how much I have in my savings account. We have been together for 6 years and married for one of those years in May. We don’t share bank accounts, her money is hers, and mine is mine. We are sitting cooking dinner in the air fryer when she just out of the blue asks, how much do you have in savings?

For me, it’s not any of her business and I told her that. Am I wrong for not telling her how much I have in savings?

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Six years ago, I found out that my wife (40F) was unfaithful, and it hit me hard. At the time, I chose to stay for the sake of our young child, hoping to keep his life stable. Over the years, we’ve tried everything—couples counseling, therapy, you name it—trying to rebuild what was broken. But no matter how much effort we’ve put in, it hasn’t worked. Our relationship has become more of a partnership in parenting than a marriage. She’s a great mother to our kids, but the love we once had is gone. I see her more as a friend or a roommate now, not the woman I fell in love with. We’ve been together for almost 18 years, but it doesn’t feel like a marriage anymore.

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My husband and his mom have an incredibly close bond. He’s the baby of the family, the one who stayed close to home, and they talk daily.

• We live across the street from them in a house they bought for us.
• We have dinner with them every Sunday and then again at their house every Monday.
• They watch our child for several hours every Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, but there’s always some criticism about my parenting.
• They buy something new for the baby every week, pay for our lawn service, bought our cars, and, of course, our house.

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My boyfriend (27M) and I (27F) have known each other for 10 years and been together for 8. We grew up together—first love, university, life milestones, everything. We moved in together after graduating and have built a stable life with similar careers and income.

Early on, we talked about marriage and agreed we’d wait until we were financially stable. After we both got good jobs, I felt ready—and our families started asking about it too. I held off bringing it up because his job was stressful.

Last year, an opportunity came up where being married could give us certain benefits. We talked seriously about a quick civil wedding and even discussed it with our families. It made me feel like he was ready.

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My husband and I met when I was pregnant with my first son. His biological father had just walked out on me after finding out about the pregnancy. He said he wanted nothing to do with it, moved away, changed his number, and disappeared completely. I didn’t hear from him again until now, six years later.

My husband has been there from day one. He stepped in without hesitation and has raised my son as his own. He even signed the birth certificate. Since then, we’ve grown our family and now have two kids together.

Everything has been going so well. He treats both children equally, and he’s an incredible father and husband.

Then, out of nowhere, my ex reached out. He says he’s ready to be part of his son’s life now.

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Several months ago, one of my husband’s closest friends got engaged. A few months later, my husband was asked to be a groomsman and he said yes. We recently received the wedding invitation, and I am not invited.

For context, my husband and I have been married for over 15 years. We used to live across the country, and because of COVID, we didn’t meet the couple during the first couple of years they were together. After moving back to our hometown, I spent some time with them. I always got along well with the groom and liked his fiancée.

I’m pretty introverted and tend to be quiet in group settings, but I’m kind and respectful. For some reason, the fiancée developed a strong dislike for me early on. I don’t know why. When I found out, I tried talking to her about it, but I didn’t get any clear answers. She eventually blocked and removed me on social media.

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