Advice Column

I’m 25 and a few weeks ago I made the dumbest decision of my life. I went out drinking, ended up at a strip club, and somehow let myself get talked into using my credit card while I was pretty drunk. I signed everything. The total came out to $9,600. Just typing that makes me want to puke.

It’s a lot of money. It doesn’t completely ruin me, but it was coming from money I’d been saving for a house. I had worked hard to build it up and in one night I torched a huge chunk of it. I feel so stupid. I keep replaying it over and over in my head. I don’t even know what I was thinking. It’s like I snapped for a night and now I’m sitting here dealing with the fallout.

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Earlier today, my mother just scream at me.

She screamed, “A child who thought that parents are not children’s obligation is a useless child. Why? Because everything that the parents did to their children when they were still a kid must be paid by their children.

They have to pay the parents. And they mustn’t keep their salary a secret, because the parents have the right to know their salary, the parents have right to know if it’s increases… To really know, how much money they must have from their children.

Children need to pay their parents from the day they were born to the day how they earned money.”

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My (32M) wife (40F) and her best friend (43F) were all hanging out at the house with a few of her other friends. Her best friend kept trying to pull me off the couch to take a shot.

She grabbed both my legs and pulled me right off the couch we started like play wrestling . We were drunk and it was all out of fun. I’m 5’3 and about 130 pounds . She’s the same height as me but weighs more.

I tried grabbing her legs and tackling her but she just pushed me to the ground and had me pinned. I was trying as hard as I could to get up and started turning bright red and my wife and all her friends started laughing so hard. Her friend was barely trying and was able to just keep me pinned there.

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My husband of one year admits he purposely tries to “keep me humble.”

Those were his exact words. He refuses to compliment me or build me up in any way, because he’s convinced that if he does, I’ll somehow become arrogant or delusional about myself.

What really set me off happened earlier today. I was in the middle of changing clothes when he looked at me and said I looked “very unappetizing.” He even compared me to food that looks gross but tastes okay. I still don’t know what that was even supposed to mean — and honestly, I don’t think there’s a way to make that sound respectful.

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I’ve been with my girlfriend since I was 18—we were high school sweethearts. I’m 27 now, and she’s 26. After high school, I started working right away and have mostly been in service jobs. Right now, I work at the UPS Store. She went the college route, studied accounting, and is now a senior associate at one of the Big Four firms. She earns a lot more than I do, which honestly doesn’t bother me. I’ve never cared much about money in the relationship.

But when I brought up the idea of marriage, she said she doesn’t want to get married until I “establish” myself professionally. The thing is, I don’t have big career ambitions—and I’m genuinely happy with the work I do.

So now I’m wondering: has our relationship run its course? Are we just too different at this point?

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Shes 60, single. I know how screwed she is, told her countless times, but she did it anyway. I don’t know how she’s going to survive on $1k social security a month and only $60k saved. No assets. No plan. Currently rents, which I help pay for.

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I’ve been married to my wife (32F) for five years, and lately, I (33M) feel like I’ve lost any sense of freedom or privacy. It’s as though every day, she’s looking for something to be upset about, and I’m always walking on eggshells.

Take our finances, for example. While we share our money, we also have our own separate accounts. Yet, she logs into my account and questions every single purchase I make, even though we’re not struggling financially at all. I can’t bring myself to ask her about her spending habits because I’m afraid it will lead to a blow-up.

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I (31F) have been friends with Sarah (31F) for over 20 years. We’ve been through a lot together—school, heartbreaks, careers, growing pains. She’s seen me at my worst, and I’ve seen her at hers. Neither of us has been perfect over the years, but recently… something shifted.

Sarah cheated on her husband.

They’ve since split, and the fallout has been painful to watch—especially because her ex, Alex, is someone our whole friend group loves and respects. He didn’t deserve what happened, and I can’t make sense of why she did it. She hasn’t reached out, and I haven’t either. I don’t even know what I’d say.

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I’m 20 years old, and I want to be successful in life. I don’t just mean money (although that’s part of it). I mean I want to feel proud of where I am, be good at what I do, and not feel lost or behind all the time.

The problem is, I have no idea where to start. I scroll through Instagram and see people my age starting businesses, traveling the world, becoming “influencers,” or already in their dream careers. Meanwhile, I’m just trying to figure out what I’m even good at.

Sometimes I feel motivated, and I try to make a plan, but then I get overwhelmed. Other times, I just shut down and waste hours on my phone. I don’t want to drift through my 20s and wake up one day feeling like I missed my chance.

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I’ve been dating a 34-year-old man for six months. One-on-one, we really click — we share similar values, traditions, and long-term goals. But I’m hesitant to introduce him to my family and friends because, in group settings, his behavior often comes off as cringey and immature.

He constantly brags about money, especially when comparing himself to people who went to university — I have a master’s degree, and he didn’t attend college. He’ll go on about how much wealthier he is than his family and how jealous they supposedly are, even though they seem like kind, normal people. I’ve gently tried encouraging more humility, but it hasn’t landed.

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